A Bank Robber Dropped His Wallet, And Now The Police Are Looking For The Guy Who Picked It Up And Robbed The Robber
Around 11:50 a.m. Monday, a robbery occurred at the US Bank inside King Soopers on Lagae Road in Castle Pines. Witness reported seeing the suspect drop a wallet, and another citizen picked it up. The sheriff’s office would like to talk to the person who has the wallet.
No, no, no, no, no. That's not how this works. There are no rules for the witnesses during a bank robbery. If that thief drops his wallet, that is fair game for anyone in the bank to pick up. There is no honor amongst theives. But for the police wanting to talk to guy who picked up the wallet......that is like them wanting to talk to someone for jaywalking when they're running out to safety. It's absurd.
Now I'm ASSUMING they're not trying to arrest the witness that picked up the wallet, but I'd imagine they want the identity of the first robber, and that they're going to make #2 give the wallet back. NOPE. Not a chance.
If I'm robber #2, I'm now blackmailing robber #1. I have his name and address......he has the money he just stole from the bank. Let's make a deal. Because honestly, what's robber #1 have going for him right now? Robber #2 holds all of the power in this situation. One little drive down to the police station and #1 is in jail. I think robber #2 deserves a 60/40 split, minimum! For doing absolutely nothing but picking up a wallet. Work smarter, not harder.
Advertisement
But when you really sit back and think about it, does robber #2 even deserve anything here? Sure, he robbed the bank and all. But he's an absolute moron. Why would you carry your wallet to a bank robbery.......? I've never robbed a bank, but I feel like it's not a decision you make on a whim. You're not just out running errands one day and then pull over, put on your mask (you should already have one on due to the pandemic though), and heist a Chase or a Capital One. This has to be something that you mentally prepare for over the course of a couple days or weeks. There's no way in hell that you don't check your pockets beforehand. This robber STINKS. But that doesn't mean the authorities deserve a helping hand in catching him.
If the investigators want any information on the initial bank robbery, they're going to have to do it the old fashioned way: with some good old police work. Here's all the information they've got. to start with:
The bank robbery suspect is described as a thin white male with a gray beard. He was wearing a red bandana and sunglasses.
You at least have to credit robber #1 for following proper pandemic protocol. Knock a couple months off his sentence if they find him.