Pray For Us All: DC Priest Contracts Coronavirus, Shook Hands With More Than 500 People Last Week

LIVE LOOK AT THE ENTIRE PLANET THE NEXT FEW WEEKS:

Real talk though, I know this is an EXTREMELY polarizing topic.  I've asked like 10 people in the medical field and the majority of them have told me it's extremely overblown and we'll all be just fine, but one person told me directed me to this article and told me there's a chance that every hospital bed in the country is filled with people who've contracted the virus my MAY 8th.  As in two months away.  I'll be honest it kinda shook me a little bit.  Ya know why?  

THE WHITE SOX ARE FINALLY FUCKING GOOD.

Now, I'm an impressionable guy.  I defer to those smarter than me on just about everything other than baseball because I recognize I'm a little slow:  This is me:

SO WHICH ONE IS IT!!! Are we all gonna be zombies come May or are we fine?  I was too young to really remember the 1994 strike, but look at Frank Thomas and the White Sox 1994 numbers:

113 games, .353/.487/.729 with a 1.217 OPS and 38 bombs and a 212 OPS+.  That season will go down as one of the BEST OFFENSIVE SEASONS EVER.  That, and they were CRUISING to a division title.  

Woulda prolly been them vs. the Expos in the World Series.  Again, I don't really remember the strike because I was only 5 years old but I swear to fucking god if this pandemic is actually real and not a joke like Dente says I'll freak the fuck out.  A flesh eating virus is literally the only thing stopping this team from being great for the better part of the next decade.  

This team fucks.  I've said it all winter and with the stories of how great the camaraderie has been behind the scenes and how hard the team is working, they're hellbent on playoffs.  I talked to one player a while back and he says they're "ready to pop bottles."  Direct quote.  Basically what I'm saying is this: don't fuck with baseball, Coronavirus, at least not until my favorite gets another World Series under its belt.  Then you can do your thing and turn me into a zombie.  Don't give a fuck.  

PS - I've noticed a ton of Cubs fans chirping the White Sox about attendance recently.  Low hanging fruit, have at it.  But I haven't gotten an actual chirp about their roster or how bad they stink in a LONG time.  Shows me they're subconsciously afraid of what the White Sox are becoming and that the Cubs' future is a little grim.  I fucking LOVE that.