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P.J. Fleck Says This Year's Minnesota Football Team Is Like Bamboo and Installing Windows in Your 4-Year-Old House

P.J. Fleck is an all-time "rah-rah" guy. He truly believes he can will his team to victory through the corniest mottos and motivational techniques and to this point, he's largely been proven right. He's Butch Jones, but with some success.

But my goodness, does he really lay it on thick.

The 2020 mantra for Minnesota football is going to be "gROW higher," a phrase which a Twitter user pointed out Fleck already used four years ago at Western Michigan — apparently he's getting short on ideas.

But whatever. If that's what he thinks is going to motivate his team, go for it. It was after he made that announcement, however, that he went into one of the weirder analogies I've seen in quite some time.

We're talking about bamboo, which I've used in the past. When you talk about bamboo, it takes three years to build underground before it actually shoots up to the top, so when you're talking about year four, that's when you should see it shoot 90-100 feet in the air … So we talked about this gRow higher and using the bamboo tree and you'll be able to see bamboo trees everywhere.

I get what he's going for. I really do. He's in his fourth year at Minnesota and wants his program to continue to build and take a big step forward this season. But we don't need bamboo trees. Whatever happened to just working hard on getting better at football?

But again, even with the bamboo thing I can see where he's trying to go. It was the next part that made so little sense I truly can't comprehend what he's talking about.

And then we talked about building the house and this is year four, so we're installing the windows. I was amazing because before our team meeting in January, players came in and asked me, 'Coach, we've been taking bets with each other and what you're actually going to have a built-in house,' so it matters to me that we're actually talking about it, but it's the window part.

What in the world is this guy talking about? Has PJ Fleck been living in a window-less house for three years?

Fleck gives me nightmare flashbacks to Butch Jones. I really hope for Minnesota fans' sakes, he continues to produce, because talking about bamboo and windows gets old really quickly when you start losing to Northwestern and Rutgers.

Everybody be on the lookout for bamboo trees sprouting up all over Minneapolis.