Father's Day Collection | T-Shirts, Hats, Polos, Crewnecks, Q-Zips and MoreSHOP NOW

Advertisement

Girl Made Jizz Filled Cupcakes (Maybe) And Passed Them Out To People At School

Screen Shot 2014-05-05 at 1.16.28 PM
 

ABC10 - A Bakersfield high school student is reported to have passed out cupcakes at school that were laced with semen and bodily fluids, but police Friday determined that no bodily fluids were found. A student at Centennial High School contacted 10News’ Scripps sister station 23ABC and said that the female 10th grader put pubic hair, semen, expired food and pills into the cupcakes. That same student said that on Thursday, the girl passed the cupcakes out to the students who were picking on her. When the students asked the girl why the cupcakes tasted bad she told them it was because she had placed bodily fluids in the cupcakes, the student told 23ABC. The cupcakes weren’t able to be tested because they had all been destroyed, and the health department was called off the investigation. Bakersfield police Sgt. Joe Grubbs said that the cupcakes were made with household kitchen items such as mayonnaise, barbecue sauce and soy sauce. 23ABC contacted school administration and the district for comment. The district is aware of the situation but has yet to comment. Students also told 23ABC that they were notified of a new policy at the school Friday stating that no outside food is allowed to be brought to the school. Students said a food day in a French class was canceled due to the incident. Police say the investigation is still ongoing.
 

So many questions, so little time. First, how dumb are these bullies to take cupcakes from this girl? That’s just about the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. You never eat the cupcakes of the girl you hate, that’s bullying 101. Second, how about the girl claiming they were filled with cum, but then the police saying they weren’t? How do the police know that? Everyone ate all the cupcakes already, they could have been filled to the brim with cum. Police officer needs to stop lying and making stuff up. And most importantly, where in the world would she get enough cum for an entire batch of cupcakes? Did she go to the sperm bank and request their finest batch? That’s kinda why I don’t buy her story and maybe Officer Lyingpants isn’t lying afterall. Because there’s no way she would be bullied if she had direct access to cum in the first place.

PS: They canceled Food Day in French class because now nobody can be trusted. And now the kids can’t pack a lunch and bring it to school either because one girl gave away cumcakes. But they can continue serving that weird rectangle pizza. Seems like in a blind taste test, you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference.