Advertisement

Stop Telling People To "Ignore Gun Girl!" Its Too Late

Poop Girl is back in the news. She went to Ohio University and got toilet paper thrown at her and everyone chanted "Where's your diaper!" and ran her off campus. Now she's crying and saying she was bullied, asking the President to shut down Ohio University, shes calling the students "terrorists" and shes threatening to come back to the campus with an "army of gun owners." Thats the latest from this hypocritical, painfully transparent sad human. 

Every time Kaitlin Bennet poops back up I mean pops back up in the news I see the same reaction every time:

Stop giving her attention!

Stop tweeting about her!

Stop posting videos of her!

Now I get it. I understand the notion. Suffocate the fire, cut off the oxygen, it will fizzle out. Its a cute idea that I wished worked. I wish you guys were right. But the problem is most of these people are new to the Poop Girl Game. I been around the block, folks. I'm an Internet 1.0, OG, Twitter Grandpa. I was around a few years back when this chick was still known as Gun Girl, ok? And I'm here to tell you to stop telling people to stop clowning Gun Girl when her turtle head pops out every now and then. Because I got bad news for you - its too late.

Advertisement

People new to the Poop Girl game think this is just some natural phenomenon? That every college campus or parade or social gathering she shows up to just naturally knows to mercilessly clown her? That these videos of her getting denied of her usual content is the first times we've seen her? No. The reason why everyone knows who she is and hates her guts is because shes, unfortunately, somehow, someway, a viral sensation that idiots follow and support. Prior to getting made fun of for shitting herself and her playing the victim card, she was a girl who made political (wo)man on the street videos. Every single time there was a mass shooting, she'd make a video when there was still blood in the goddam streets talking about her right to own her special murder toys. She amassed hundreds of thousands of followers, and probably got millions of views on her videos. Prior to anyone asking her if she pooped herself at a frat party, prior to the videos of cops and college students OWNING her in all her gimmicks, she was able to successfully put out videos that the extreme right absolutely loved. She would make videos about how everyone should own guns while parents were still mourning the deaths of their children. She'd make videos about transgender people in bathrooms veiled in political debate that were nothing more than a vehicle to hate on LGBTQ people. She'd make videos about abortion that were just radicalized bullshit. They'd all go viral. They'd all be used by morons from the right to promote more hateful, ignorant shit. 

So, no, ignoring Poop Girl does not make the problem go away. Its like, I dunno, hypothetically speaking, if I was at a party and I was drunk and had to take a shit, I wouldn't just ignore that feeling and hope the issue would go away. Me, personally? I'd go find the nearest toilet and poop in that. What I wouldnt do is bury my head in the sand and pretend I didnt have to poop. Thats a surefire way to end up shitting your pants at a frat party. 

The horse is out of the barn on this one, folks. The poop is out of the butt. If this girl was a nobody, with zero followers and no track record of (unfortunately) having viral success, I would agree. Lets not create a monster by giving her attention. But credit to her, she already found her fan base and drummed up her own following and attention. Shes in bed with Alex Jones and fucking Info Wars - goddam Sandy Hook deniers. So to me its basically pick your poison:

Do you want Poop Girl or Gun Girl? Do you want videos of police officers owning her in debate, college students embarrassing her by not falling for her shtick, and people chanting about diapers & poop while waving toilet paper in her face - OR - videos of her drumming up more support for her reckless, misinformed, detestable, hateful, warped viewpoints on guns, gays, abortion, and whatever else the lunatics from the Alt Right, Info Wars sect of society are pushing? I'll take the funny videos, thank you very much. Seriously please understand this - Poop Girl is absolutely going to continue to exist. There is no way shes going to disappear, because A) the country is extremely polarized 2) there are a TON of radicalized idiots on both sides of the aisle that will continue to stoke the fire whether or not you, individually, ignore her and d) like it or not, the internet and social media is where people get their news and the information and someone who already has the following she does if effectively built into the internet itself. Its too late.

So continue to clown her so that the only exposure she gets is embarrassing content showing how ineffective she now is at conducting these interviews. Make sure every Gun Girl video is proving her to be a fucking idiot. Just make sure you DO NOT physically touch her or harm her. ONLY words. And props. I'll give you props. Those are funny. Bring diapers. Bring toilet paper. DO NOT throw things at her. Never touch her. Do not scare her. Do not make her feel unsafe. Because A) thats fucking weird you shouldnt ever be doing that to anybody, in any situation. That makes you a bad person, and b)THAT is the example of giving her ammo, giving her leverage, and letting her create a narrative that she's an average person and the college students/parade participants/people on the street are the radicalized lunatics. DO NOT let her flip that script. She is the radical, brainwashed, attention whore and it needs to stay that way. She is the one who shows up where she is not wanted, provokes disagreement, and then says shes getting bullied. She puts herself in those spots. Its not bullying when you willingly show up and start shit! Not ONE of these videos is ever Gun Girl peacefully hosting her own events and a leftist showing up to invade her scene and pick a fight. IF she stopped her antics, there would never be a single mention of her ever again. So, no, this is not bulliyng. And its definitely not fucking TERRORISM like shes trying to claim this latest go round. This is an idiotic child who bit off more than she can chew and now that the world has caught on to her and shut her operation down, she spirals and grasps at straws and plays the victim.

Advertisement

But what I do think we can do, as opposed to ignoring her and thinking it will all go away, is not play into her game. I see some of these people taking the bait and going too far and it drives me insane. The problem is people like Kaitlin Bennet are professional trolls and know exactly what they are doing. Their content and their tactics are intentionally chosen to always have the victim fallback, and I think its time that we conceptualize that tactic. Is there a word for that? I'm not as in tune with arguing politics online as some of you are - is there a catch-all phrase for that? Like the way people use "gaslighting" all over the place and everyone accepts it and understands it and you dont need to explain yourself at length and in turn sound like you're stumbling and fumbling over your words as you argue with assholes like Poop Girl. Here is the deal:

Poop Girl, and many of her kind, create content veiled as thoughtful and engaging debate & discussion when in reality its nothing more than antagonistic bullshit which is presented in such a way that, when exposed for what it truly is, allows the perpetrator to play the victim and fall back on broad defenses (often applied incorrectly) like freedom of speech. They are usually slightly more informed on their topic, utilizing a handful of statistics or factoids to give the appearance that they are an educated expert on the topic, speaking from a place of knowledge and facts trying to further their cause, when anyone with a brain and a shred of life experience can see they are nothing more than an attention whore provoking people in order to gain popularity. 

Is there a word for that? I suppose "troll" captures a lot of that. But we need a word for that so people that goes deeper so they can just say "Oh, Kaitlin Bennet? Shes a ______" "Gun Girl loves ______ ing." Something to explain an asshole like that. Just a one word, catch all phrase so you - the normal rational person - dont have to provide this bulletproof, ironclad, DBQ essay with a proper bibliography to explain why this internet troll is just a dickhead. When I see and smell shit on the sidewalk, I dont need to go to the lab and test it to find out its shit. I just know its shit. Just like Kaitlin Bennet. Any adult with a functioning brain can see you and smell you, literally, a mile away. I've seen you show up at inappropriate times to peaceful events with people who do not like you, do not align with your beliefs, and do not want you there, and ask intentionally antagonistic leading and accusatory questions - you are an asshole. I dont need to explain myself any further by citing amendments and laws and stats and shit. You suck. You pooped your pants. End of story.

But you better believe I'll be saying that every time she comes out from under her bridge. Because thinking she'll just fade away and disappear is some naive ass wishful thinking.  

PS - When your bio on social media used to be chock full of links and @'s and descriptions to further your cause that you would (allegedly) (apparently) die for, and then you get rid of all of that to chirp at me, I win. Call it real estate in your brain..say "rent free!"...call it whatever you want. No matter what shot you're taking at me, when you're changing up your crusade because I've incinerated you for the 50th time, you're rattled. I win. Case closed. 

PPS - Please do not confuse any of this with actual politics. If youre a reasonable person who supports Trump or leans right or have legitimate arguments about gun control and all the other hot button issues, thats cool. I'm fine with that. Like most rational humans I fall somewhere in the middle of all this. But do not think that if you are pro-2A or a republican that you need to support this girl's content. You can be conservative and still admit this chick sucks. 

PPPS (The triple PS!) - As always, I actually feel bad for her and believe shes a young girl who's been brainwashed and manipulated and turned into a politicized puppet by others around her. Its a sad story really. 

*

*

Watch KFC Radio every Tuesday and Thursday only on Barstool Gold. In addition to video podcasts, you can watch the Barstool Documentary, Feitelberg’s cartoon series “The 1 Thing I Learned,” all-new bonus episodes of Pardon My Take, KFC Radio & KFC Radio Classic, as well as Skype Rundowns, live video AMAs, and other video content from some of your favorite personalities such as Large and Donnie. As a Barstool Gold Hardcore member, you’ll also receive free shipping in our store, the ability to watch RNR PPV events at no cost, fewer ads, exclusive merch and the chance to take a tour of Barstool HQ. Join the most hardcore Stoolies and subscribe now: barstoolgold.com/kfc

Advertisement