The Ku Klux Klan In South Carolina Is Handing Out Candy To Help Recruit Members

SENECA, S.C. – Some residents in northwestern South Carolina say they found bags of candy on their street containing a piece of paper asking them to join the Ku Klux Klan. Residents in an Oconee County subdivision found the bags Saturday night or Sunday morning. CBS affiliate WSPA reports that the flyer says “Save Our Land, Join The Klan.” It has a phone number that led to an automated message discussing KKK efforts against illegal immigration. The station reported that the message also says “If it ain’t white, it ain’t right. White power.”

Hey, are the KKK some of the biggest asshole scumbags to ever exist?  Absolutely.  That’s something almost all of us can agree on.  But do people love candy?  Hell yes.  And are there some people out there that are stupid enough to join the KKK because they were offered candy?  Most definitely.  I mean people will at least hear them out I would think.  So while the KKK are big time pieces of shit, I can’t stand here and say they don’t have a decent marketing department with this candy thing.  The only critique I would give them in their strategy is maybe stretch for some better types of candy.  While Smarties are without a doubt super delicious I’m pretty sure they give those away free at every hardware store and barber shop.  Not exactly turning heads there.  And those mints shown in the picture?  Useless.  As plain and boring as it gets.  If the KKK really want this to work they need to invest money into it.  Put money in, get recruits out.  Since anything chocolate is probably out of the question I’d recommend going with Skittles or Starburst.  Find me a person who says they don’t like either one of those types of candy and I’ll show you a liar.  Toss a few red Starbursts into that letter ya got there and you’ll have people flocking to your meetings.  And hey, KKK, good luck with your recruitment.  Go fuck yourself.