Father Of The Year Award Goes To Ilya Kovalchuk For Dangling The Heck Out Of His Kids
Everybody knows this new generation of hockey players coming up is Charmin Ultra Soft. These little peasants just walk into the league and expect everything to be handed to them. They want top 6 minutes before they even play their first shift. They want powerplay minutes. If they don't sign a massive contract coming off of their ELC, they cry to their agents and hold out. The kids these days simply can't comprehend the idea that you have to EARN IT (shoutout $20 Chef).
But here comes Ilya Kovalchuk teaching his kids a very valuable life lesson at an early age. Not everything is given to you in life. Sometimes you have to figure out a way to take it on your own. And sometimes? Well sometimes you just don't have what it takes yet to take it so you've got to ride the bus from Rochester to Utica every weekend for a while.
You think you can play 3 years Super League? Think again, twerp. Not until you can get the puck off your old man. So shoutout to Kovy for making sure he's bringing his boys up the right way. And what a saucy saucy set of mittens this man has on him.