Taylor Swift Makes A Vocabulary Video To Teach You New York City Lingo
Miss Manhattan can’t stop wont stop! First she’s hanging out with Carmelo and The Junkyard Dog Jerome Williams. TriBeCa has officially been renamed “Taybeca.” And now she’s giving us the down low on street speak. The 411 on New York City talk. Thanks to Tay Tay we all know that a “bo-day-guh” is a corner store thats open 24/7. We know that a “stoop” is a fucking staircase. She’ll save you the embarrassment of pronouncing Hows-ton street as Hyoo-stun. But what if we had Taylor really give you the scoop on the inner workings of New York City? What if she schooled you on some true blue NYC vocab. Like:
Anti-Semetic Elmo: Anti-Semetic Elmo is a Times Square character who, on the surface, appears friendly and funny. Turns out he’s a much more nefarious character who has a deep dark past with Cambodian child porn, tried to extort the Girl Scouts for $2 million, hates Jews, and has faced several assault cases over the years. Anti-Semetic Elmo is not our friend.
“Showtime!”: This is a phrase that young black asshole breakdancers yell on the subway before doing some dumb ass acrobatic dance routine where they almost kick every single train passenger in the face. Do not lift your head up from your book or your cell phone and definitely do not tip these dickheads.
Train Traffic: A concept that makes such little sense it actually makes you want to lay down on the tracks and allow the train to roll over your body when it finally begins moving again.
“Stand clear of the closing doors” = Get ready for some old Asian woman to cram into the train and pack you in ass to dick some Muslim guy
“You want DVD?”: A statement uttered by ancient Asian women as they pull a rolling suitcase full of bootleg DVDs through your local bar
These are the real things we need T Swift defining. The real things that people need to know when they come to New York. Now cue the motherfuckin music!
