Nutritionists HATE him, figure out why! As much as this meal seems as if it is an intentional effort to produce bubble guts full of sarin gas, I can't help but think he is onto something. After all, it hits all the major food groups. Eggs? They're crucial to growth. By eating other species babies, we absorb their strength while making sure that chickens understand who the boss is.
You know who else eats Sardines? Sharks. Don't you want to have a Shark's thick-ass traps? Stick to this meal plan, and you'll end up with a Takeo Spikes neck in months.
Sauerkraut? By eating the food of the Germans, you take on their mentality. No more slacking off at work or having a sense of humor for you. From now on, you are a perfectionist that finds memes and irony-laced KBnoswag blogs "a waste of time that could be spent working".
Welcome to the Fitness Zone, bitch.