Some Poor Son Of A Bitch Got Absolutely TRUCKSTICKED By A Deer While Walking Through A McDonald's Parking Lot
I imagine everyone reading this blog has made that sad walk back to the car after a trip to Mickey D's. Maybe you went a McNugget too far, overserved yourself by opting for the delicious hot fudge sundae (while putting the peanuts on top to make it healthier), or just wish you had danced around the Dollar Menu instead of going with a Value Meal. No matter what happened underneath those golden arches, that hike through the parking lot with that fried oil smell that may somehow be the most delightful aroma on the planet is always tough sledding.
Which is why having your journey randomly interrupted by a deer Liu Kang dragonkicking you into the shadow realm as you recount what just went down in that McDonald's is maybe the worst thing that can happen to a human. At least if you got mollywhopped by a stray dog or mauled by a bear, you will end up with the scars and stories that could get you laid or at least a free beer. But getting Trucksticked by a deer isn't going to get you any cool points with your grandkids while you are bouncing them on your knee. It doesn't that if that deer dropped from the clouds and came off the edge to hit the blindspot harder than anything Nick Bosa will do to Patrick Mahomes on Sunday (I can't wait to see where this deer ends up on Coley's Big Board come April).
HOWEVAH, I do have to tip my cap to this guy for one reason and one reason only. He kept his drink upright which likely means he stopped any of the sweetest nectar on the planet, McDonald's Coke, from spilling on the ground.
Heroes get remembered but legends never die.