Cardinals Fans Say We Don't Understand Wainwright's Dry Sense Of Humor And Blame Him Sucking On The Fact That Yadier Molina Wasn't Catching

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Well its official, folks. Everyone in the country outside of St. Louis knew it but after last night’s performance from Cardinals fans solidifies it. They are the single most delusional assholes on the planet. First of all, calling Adam Wainwright “Waino” might be the worst nickname of all time. Every time I see them say Waino I feel I’m on the “Shmoopie” episode of Seinfeld. Secondly this notion that it was Jonathan Lucroy’s fault that Wainwright basically gave up the cycle to the AL in about 45 seconds is absolutely insane. I mean its one thing to just be a homer and ride Yadier Molina’s dick but these assholes genuinely think “Waino” would have been lights out last night if it wasn’t for Lucroy. Because what we really needed was another Cardinal in the game for the NL last night. Matheny Wainwright and Neshek all did so well, another Cardinal would have been the difference maker.

But the real rich stuff is St. Louis fan’s saying that we just don’t get Wainwright’s humor. He has a dry sense of humor. Something nobody outside the city limits of St. Louis has ever encountered, apparently. We just didn’t get that he was totally joking about Jeter, guys. If we could only be as good of baseball fans and as funny as Cardinals fans, we’d all be better people. Its all the media’s fault, its all our fault, and its all Jonathan Lucroy’s fault. Has nothing to do with the fact that Wainwright just had a shitty night and really, really fucked up by opening his mouth about the Jeter Pipe Shot.

Bottom line is this: 1) Go watch the video from his original interview I posted last nite. Dude wasn’t joking. He just flat out wasn’t. You don’t need to be some expert comic to detect it. He chuckles when he said he should have pitched better but when explaining the Jeter situation he’s being serious. And 2) Even if Wainwright has some sense of humor only detectable by the advanced psyche of Cardinals fans, he shouldn’t be saying that shit anyway. Joking or not the point that was beaten to death last night is that you shouldn’t say anything. You got shelled by the rest of the lineup – it would have been just as easy to say “Jeets was leading off a tremendous batting order for the AL and they got the best of me. I tip my cap to them. Re2pect.” Instead you were an asshole and brought this shit storm on yourself and now have your weirdo cult fans scrambling making the single dumbest excuses on the planet.

I know its just an exhibition game and I don’t actually care about the runs that were scored and the NL losing. Fuck if anything I wanted Wainwright to gas 3 right by Jeter and embarrass him. I probably would have cheered for “Waino” if he did that. But he sucked and he was a dick and now its just nice to expose the Cardinals fans, once again, on a particularly insane level, for the delusional idiots that they are.

Shout out to @BestFansStLouis for some of the tweets. Doing God’s work, as always.