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Mets Fans Can Officially Cross Off David Wright As A Potential Managerial Replacement For Carlos Beltran

Here I thought watching Jarred Kelenic pulling off baseball trick shots like some Seattle Globetrotter was going to be the worst thing to happen to my Mets soul today.

Instead, we finally got confirmation that David Wright will NOT be the Mets manager. I know he was never seriously mentioned for the role. But you have to remember the Mets reportedly had a bombshell managerial candidate that never exploded before or after Carlos Beltran was hired and David Wright becoming the manager of the New York Mets would be whatever is 10 levels above a nuclear bomb. Hiring David Wright would have been like firing a Death Star into Mets fans souls except in a good way. David Wright 

I don't give a shit that Wright doesn't have any managerial experience considering every other candidate the Wilpons have interviewed (including Beltran) is in the same boat and the role of baseball manager seems to have evolved into being the middle man that puts the players where the nerdy data people tell him to, answers to the media, and is the face of the franchise to the fans. Name a person in Mets history better at being a good soldier, handling the media, AND is more beloved by the fans than David Wright. You can't. Wright would pretty much be our Jake Taylor from Major League 2 except if Lou Brown got fired "stepped down" for being involved in this decade's gigantic cheating scandal in baseball, wouldn't require all that much money from the Wilpons since he made a bazillion dollars to not play baseball the last few years, and managing could only do so much to Wright's health outside of the chance of a piano falling on him because of Mets luck.

However, he gracefully bowed out and has the Mets competing for managers with two big time MLB franchises with monstrous payrolls and a championship in the last 3 years.

The Astros should not be allowed to hire a manager before the Red Sox do and neither of them should be allowed to hire a manager before the Mets do. Fucking dicks.

Speaking of the Astros, as much as I wanted the Mets to keep Beltran because I hate caving to public pressure, it may have been tough for him to get back some of the #RE2PECT him and every other Astro lost as more info from this scandal leaks out.

P.S. Would it be weird if I do everything within my power to find out where David Wright lives, move there or at least as close as my blogger salary will allow me to, and register my 5-year-old daughter for a 4-year-old tee ball team in hopes Wright is her coach and we become best friends? Because it feels like it straddles the line between weird and awesomely romantic (in a totally normal, best buddies type of way).