Britain's Most Notorious Prison Inmate Buttered Himself Up And Attacked 12 Guards Because His Soccer Team Lost

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Huff Po – Those guards had butter be careful. Infamous British prisoner Charles Bronson wrote this month that he buttered himself up and brawled with 12 prison guards after his least favorite soccer team won,according to the Mirror. After Arsenal was victorious in the FA Cup,Bronson wrote that he “lost it” in a letter to a friend obtained by several outlets. Bronson, a long-time inmate notorious for brawling, is a fan of Arsenal’s opponents in the match, Hull. The “rumble” at a prison in York resulted in several broken ribs for Bronson, who said he greased himself up to make it harder for the dozen guards in riot gear to restrain him. “Obviously I had my reasons and I’d sooner swallow teeth than my pride,” Bronson wrote in the note. “Sadly I came off worst — got smashed up ribs.” The Independent provides a bit of background on Bronson, who is commonly referred to as Britain’s “most violent prisoner.” From the Independent: Born Michael Gordon Peterson, Bronson was jailed for seven years in 1974 for armed robbery at a Post Office, but has been locked up for much of the time since then following a string of violent incidents, including assault, hostage-taking and damage. He’s spent 36 years in solitary confinement, a condition that many civil and human rights groups view as torture. Bronson is also an artist. “Come and join us on a journey into madness,” his website says. “But if you’re coming… bring a torch.”

Its stories like this that really make you put things in perspective about your own fandom. Like there are times where I tell myself I am way to emotionally invested in the Mets. The up and down roller coaster Sunday after Sunday watching the Jets is absolutely brutal on my heart. Sometimes I feel like I’m just way too affected by the teams I root for.

And then you hear a story about Charles Bronson greasing himself up with 10 sticks of butter to give him an advantage when he decides to brawl with a dozen prison guards because his team lost and you realize “alright I ain’t that bad.” Its like Opie in Sons of Anarchy just stepping into the cell with all those prison guards ready to meet his fate. Charles Bronson has been in solitary for 36 years. He’s a professional prison inmate. All he cares about is Hull winning and getting greased up with enough Land O Lakes that he buys himself at least enough time to get a couple shots in on his guards. Next time you think you’re a diehard fan, think of this guy.