Dave Portnoy Reporting Live From the Eye of the Storm - Barstool College Football Show Week 5WATCH NOW

Wake Up With A Homemade Italian Beef

Some people are gonna bitch that Chicago Johnny(1) threw a little cheese in the bun and that's okay with me. For everyone else - get as mad as you want. You're more than welcome. Personally, after Bears Packers yesterday I don't know if I have the muscle to get into an argument about cheese on a beef. At this point and after this season, I just need to calm down and remind myself what I love about being from this city because it most certainly isn't our godforsaken (literally) sports teams. We suck at literally everything except when it comes to Itlaian Beef and some other staples of a Midwest diet. If you got a few hours to kill and a device that will mince a full bulb of garlic, let's jump in. 

Alternatively, we have an outdoor option for all you guys with weber grills on your River North balconies.

I think new tradition now is you have to make your own beef when the Bears' season is over. Call it a sign of respect or an ode to a forgotten season. Either way someone hand me the JP Graziano giard because my beef is gonna be extra hot today. Need need NEED it. 

PS - it's okay if you pre-cummed a little bit when he dipped it

(1) Chicago Johnny's is a youtube guy. Definitely not trying to confuse him with the Johnnie's Beef in Elmwood Park. A mistake like that will literally get you murdered