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Phil Kessel Is Just Astoundingly Ugly

USA Hockey 2014 Olympic Portraits

USA Hockey 2014 Olympic Portraits

USA Hockey 2014 Olympic Portraits

USA Hockey 2014 Olympic Portraits

 

 

 

I don’t want to be mean, but Phil Kessel is so gross in these pictures it’s horrifying. There’s no other way to describe it. If that makes me a dick then that makes me a dick… but Phil, your face? Yeesh. Balding, slouch neck, acne, bloated like you drank 1000 beers last night. Just none of it is working. Maybe one or two of those things can be overcome with money and hockey talent. But dude is so ugly that I still don’t think chicks fuck him even though he’s one of the best hockey players in the world. Guy is next level putrid.