Your Obligatory Annual "Ash Wednesday Is For Suckers" Blog

Screen Shot 2014-03-05 at 10.13.58 AM


Now I’m not gonna do, what everyone thinks I’m gonna do, and FLIP OUT. Every year I post a friendly reminder that if you smear soot all over your face and walk around with it all day, you’re an asshole. And I still stick by that. The millions of people who just go to church on Christmas and Easter now decide, out of all the weird traditions and ceremonies, this is gonna be the one they decide to partake in. Skip virtually every other rule and shit, but the one where you get dirt on your head, yup – sign me up for that one. Its the ultimate “Look at me! Look at me! I’m Catholic!” move.

Now, that being said, every year I post this, the Barstool Atheist crowd comes out in droves to bash anything and everything religion oriented. And while I understand its hypocritical of me to make fun of Ash Wednesday and then defend religious people, I hate Atheist with every fiber of my being. Every religion blog they show up commenting the same cliche, trite quips like “So you believe there’s a magical wizard in the sky serving you crackers???” So unbelievably lame. So, this year, this is a 2 part blog – 1) you’re a jackass if you walk around with ashes, and 2) you’re a complete fucking dickhead if you’re one of these atheists preaching to everyone how believing in God is stupid. I discussed this on MailTime last nite, but you atheists who can’t shut the fuck up realize you’re just as bad as the evangelical religious nuts preaching to everyone about God, right?  You’re just preaching about no God. Different argument, just as fucking annoying. Any time anyone mentions God, you losers can’t help but dive into all the arguments and all the points why you think God isn’t real and you think people of faith are dumb and blah blah blah. Guess what, guy? Nobody gives a fuck about your non-beliefs, the same way nobody cares about the diehard Christians babbling about the Bible. Its like impossible for you nerds to just let it slide. I don’t care if you believe, don’t believe – whatever – but the assholes who pontificate one way are the other are all in the same boat: you’re all dickheads and people don’t like you.

This concludes the anti-religious yet strangely pro-religious blog.