The Meet Market Breakdown - Brooklyn Brewmaster Seeks Beer Wench

After last weeks edition of the Meet Market the New York Post out did themselves in their newest match up.

Meet Andrew, a 29 year old brewery worker living in Brooklyn looking for love in the borough.   The NY Post is setting him up with one of the following gals, and we’re here to help breakdown the contestants.

Meet Market – Andrew will go out with one of these three girls. Who do you think he should date?

Contestant 1, Emily, 25 years old – Production Manager.  She likes: a guy who can debate. “I don’t want someone to agree with everything,” she notes. Favorite ice cream flavor: rocky road.  Celebrity crush: Robert Pattinson.  Shoe gal: Emily owns a pair of New York Knicks high heels.  Meal of choice: steak and potatoes.  Alive and kicking: She used to play and coach soccer.

Annnddd we’re off.  Batting first is Emily, a handsome red head with tattoos on her hand that limit her employment status to that of working in a factory.  Bring her over to Clyde Fraisers in her New York Knicks heels and she’ll run up the tab with a 20 oz. porterhouse and a mound of potatoes.  What a splendid evening that sounds like.

Contestant 2, Kaitlyn, 24 years old –  Online editor. She is: optimistic. “I always look on the bright side of things,” she says. She likes: well-rounded guys — “someone who can talk philosophy and cheese,” Kaitlyn says. Guilty pleasure: cheese Goldfish. Bar order: whiskey, neat. Home town: She’s a Bronx native. Good signs: Kaitlyn’s favorite game is charades. Three cheers: She roots for the home teams — Knicks, Yankees and Giants.

Batting second we have Kaitlyn, a Bronx born gal looking to eat cheese and talk philosophy.  Just my type.  After a box of goldfish and some straight up Makers Mark she has to put a belt 6 inches above her stomach to keep from not exploding.

Contestant 3, Samantha, 26 years old – Administrative coordinator. She is: adventurous. “I enjoy friends and family, but I also like to explore the rest this world has to offer,” Sam explains. She likes: a guy who can move. “A guy who knows how to dance is a turn-on,” she says. Biggest fear: roaches. Turn-offs: bad breath.  On her DVR: “Modern Family”. Favorite music: Indie. Game of choice: Cards Against Humanity

In the 3 hole we have Samantha, personally I’d have put her as clean up due to the muscle but that’s out of my hands.  A dancing queen who needs a man who knows how to groove.  Better pop a piece of winterfresh in before you get too close or you ain’t getting no milkshake.

In conclusion Andrew, take that skinny tie and wrap it around your neck til those 1950’s glasses pop off your face