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Sisqo Says The 'Thong Song' Boosted Victoria's Secret Thong Sales By 80%

E! Online- Hello and welcome back to 1999! Yes, the one and only Sisqo is taking us back in time to relive the making of one-hit wonder “Thong Song.” Way back when, while tirelessly on his Unleash the Dragon album, the singer decided to “blow off some steam” and go out on a date. Nothing life changing, right? Well… “I meet this girl, and I wasn’t married or nothing back then, so we get back to the crib, and you know, I’m rounding second base and next thing you know she starts to come up out of her clothes and I see this…this…THING,” he recalled in a 20th anniversary interview with Def Jam. “I was like, ‘What is that?!’ She was like, ‘It’s a thong!’ I was like, ‘A THONG?!'”

“By the time the song had blown up, we went to go have a meeting with Victoria’s Secret,” he continued. “They were like, ‘As much as we love the song, and you seem like a great guy…but thong sales have already gone up 80 percent.’ They had got their bag already. But fast forward 20 years later and we laughed all the way to the bank too.”

For some reason I’ve been seeing Sisqo’s name in the news a lot recently. I don’t know why that’s happening and I simply cannot be bothered to ask why but it’s a thing. I like Sisqo a lot but haven’t thought about him in quite some time. Much like many other red blooded males my age, Sisqo ushered in an era of looking at scantily clad women in music videos. I was 10 years old in 1999 when the ‘Thong Song’ song came out so you can only imagine how boned up I was when I saw the music video for the first time.

Then I see this quote about Sisqo saying the Thong Song resulted in an 80% boost in Victoria’s Secret thong sales and my first thought was, “Well that’s simply not true. It can’t be.” Like would a song about thongs, albeit a very very VERY popular song about thongs, really move the needle to the tune of an 80% spike in sales? No way. But the more I thought about it, the more plausible it became. Then the more plausible it became the more I started to accept the idea as a stone cold fact that could not be disputed.

I mean look at how many views the Thong Song has on YouTube

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100 MILLION views. That’s a lot of views folks. Not to mention I had no fucking idea what a thong was back in 1999. Now granted, like I said, I was 10 years old when the song came out so I wasn’t exactly well versed in female under garments, but I feel like Sisqo took something that only a certain percentage of the population knew about and shoved it into the mainstream. That song was EVERYWHERE for what felt like 5 years. So so so many people being exposed to the tantalizing idea of cheek-less underwear.

Take those things into consideration and now I’m this guy

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(I did my best to make a #meme but I’m not exactly Milmore or Quigs)

I am now convinced that Sisqo and the ‘Thong Song’ boosted Victoria’s Secret thong sales by 80% and probably more. I have that in my mind as a fact right up there with the sky being blue. So props to me for keeping an open mind, starting this blog thinking one thing, doing the research, looking at the facts (that I kinda made up but whatever) and then changing my opinion.

By the way, if everything Sisqo said is true and Sisqo simply missed out on collaborating with Victoria’s Secret on thongs that suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks. He would’ve made bank and been able to live the rest of his life on a tropical island somewhere thanks to thong money. Alas.