Ohhhhh real cool guy. We’re all super impressed. Just causally froiclikcing around with two alligators in the water and tongue kissing them via marshmallows. Get a room. For a minute there I thought some Barry White music was going to fade in and we were gonna see this guy start pile driving a gator. Mother fucking Southerners doing what they do best. Getting weirdly close and borderline sexual with swamp monsters. People ay Iowa is weird, it’s a whole different world down there.
PS- I’m not saying I’d let an alligator eat a marshmallow directly from my mouth, but I’m not saying I wouldn’t either.