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Check Out This Smug Bitch Who Tried To Stab Her Man After He Refused To Cuddle

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TSGA Florida woman was arrested early Saturday for battering her live-in boyfriend after he refused to “cuddle” with her when they went to bed. Shavonna Rumph, 31, and Henry Price, 33, “had been drinking together at their residence and had been doing so throughout the night,” according to a Manatee County Sheriff’s Office report. The couple subsequently quarreled, “over Henry refusing to ‘cuddle’ with Shavonna when they went to bed.” The argument “turned physical when Shavonna grabbed Henry by the shirt, causing it to tear.” Price then attempted to leave the couple’s Bradenton residence to “prevent any further argument and Shavonna didn’t want him to leave.” On a section of the sheriff’s report describing weapons used during the alleged attack, a deputy wrote “Knife/cutting Instrument.” Rumph was charged with misdemeanor domestic battery and booked into the county jail, from which she was released Sunday.

Cuddling has got to be the most selfish thing your chick can ask you to do. It fucking sucks. Doesn’t just happen in bed either. Without fail, if I’m sprawled out on my couch flipping through the channels in some weird but awesomely comfortable position, my girl will squeeze her ass into a narrow crevice to cuddle. If I don’t say no, then I say goodbye to peace & relaxation. In a minute or two, she’ll ask me to slide over and make more room…then move my leg so she can curl hers up…then move my arm so she can shimmy onto my chest. Before I know it, I’m hanging half off the couch uncomfortable as fuck with a dead arm & a stiff neck while the cuddle monster is out cold drooling right through my t-shirt. Still, that might be a better option than saying no. Telling a chick to go sit on the other couch because you’re comfortable could lead to a half-hour rant on why you’re such an insensitive asshole. Better off losing feeling in an appendage if it results in silence. Hell, I’d rather get stabbed than listen.

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