A List Of Foods I Haven't Tried Before, No Cap


I wanted to get this off my chest for a while now, and now I feel this is the best time. On Friday, Large (the father I never had) invited me on his show to take my soup virginity away. Large couldn't believe I've never tried this dish before, he treated me like I was some kind of creature which made me feel right at home. To summarize, soup was the most underwhelming food I've ever tried. I thought I was eating pizza sauce in a bowl. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't something I felt like I've wasted years of my life on. I also tried an oyster with Large and liked it more than the soup.


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I can see how old people enjoy this cause most of them don't have teeth, but it was bland to me. I think another reason I never had the desire to try this was because my Grandma was a big time slurper. She'd slurp on everything! Fish sandwiches, burgers, soup, drinks, it was disgusting! She also hummed music and sniffed her nose 25/7. I think living with her is the reason I might have mysophonia. I can barely watch blowjobs on the internet without chucking the air pods! I just got straight to the pounding.


Trying new foods was always a struggle for me, but I'm a basic guy. I wear sweats every day, listen to the same music, and eat the same meals. For example,


Breakfast: French Toast Sticks with Eggs, Oatmeal, or nothing


Lunch: Burger, ham and cheese or turkey and cheese


Snack: Banana


Dinner: Chicken breast, Veggie, and Pasta/Rice.


Late Night Snack: PB&J and Cheese Nips or Oreos with Milk


As long I can still hit 3 pointers, why change my diet? Besides soup, there's tons of foods and things I've never tried before. Let me know which one shocks you:


-Coffee (That's normal, that makes your teeth yellow and mine are already yellow enough)


-Bake Beans


-Soda (When I was 4, my family and I were driving up to Pittsburgh for Christmas. My lemonade was next to my Mom's mountain dew and I accidentally drank the MT Dew and spit all over the car. I always hated the fizz of soda).


-Sushi


-Guacamole


-Salsa


-Cherry


-Lobster


-Artichoke


-Pussy


-Brussel Sprouts


-Lime


-Nuts (bag of nuts, any kind)


-Pear


-Pineapple


-Olives


-Orange


-Ramen


-Tofu


-Cucumber


-Pickle (I actually tried a pickle not too long ago. I ordered a plain Chick-fil-A sandwich but those bastards surprised me with a pickle. I spit that shit out quick. Wasn't bad, just wasn't feeling it).


-Blueberries


-Spicy Food (Just hate spice in general)


-Avocado


-Mango


-Mushrooms


-Lunchable


Thats all I got off the top of my head. I'm sure there's more if you threw some at me. Not food related but I've never ridden a bike, a roller coaster, or been to a rub n tug. Theres a first time for everything and I may need to start checking these off the list. Especially the rub n tug.