Japan (Surprise Surprise) Unveils Virtual Reality Robot Handjobs

Huff Po – Over the weekend, a virtual sex simulator debuted in Japan, Kotaku reported. The “VR Tenga” is the product of a joint effort from adult toy company Tenga and virtual reality pioneer Oculus VR, the company behind an immersive virtual reality headset called the Oculus Rift. The VR Tenga was unveiled at an Oculus Rift game jam in Tokyo and, as can be seen in the NSFW video below, has at least a few people excited. The device attaches a Novint Falcon—a grip-based, haptic controller—to a Tenga, a Japanese industrial masturbator. Used as intended, the user would insert his penis into the Tenga, which would be manipulated by the Falcon. All the while the user views on his Oculus some sort of visual stimulation synced to the movement of the hybrid Falcon/Tenga. In a HuffPost/YouGov survey conducted in April, eighteen percent of respondents said they believed sex robots would be available by 2030, while only nine percent said they would have sex with a robot if they had the opportunity.

Here’s a question for you – if you’re gonna have a robot work your dick, why would you not develop a virtual reality robotic blow job? Whats the difference? Either way its a robot machine and a fake video that you’re watching. Why not have her sucking your sick? Why develop an inferior dick-milking experience? Just like with chicks, I guarantee I can give a better handjob than this fucking Japanese Tenga machine. Make that machine and that little Hentai cartoon S my D.

I mean really why bother with all the time and money and energy to create a machine that just gets you to sloppy 2nd base? Or am I getting too greedy? Maybe the technology isn’t there yet? Maybe this machine just doesn’t feel like a blow job. That would probably be even worse. If the girl on the virtual reality screen was blowing me but the Tenga machine was giving me a woodchipper hand job I’d be furious. I guess my whole point is that Japan should come up with a blow job robot and if the technology isn’t there and they can only make a handjob android then just don’t even bother. I work my own dick better than anyone or anything else – living, robotic or otherwise.

PS – What base do you say a handjob is? I say 2nd base is feeling a chick up and she kinda rubs your D over the pants. Which would mean handjobs are 3rd base…but 3rd base is definitely a blow job. Thats why I said sloppy 2nd where you’re about to round third? I dunno sound off.