Have You Guys Heard The One About The Stoolie Chick Who Wants To Be A Sexologist?
Girls, throw him a bone every now and then and wake him up with a blowjob. Not everyday though…don’t want him getting spoiled
#AskREL
— AskREL (@AskREL) May 16, 2013
Girls, put a small vibe in your ass while he fucks you.Your pussy will feel its vibrating for him. Don’t be afraid of new sensations#AskREL — AskREL (@AskREL) May 15, 2013
Girls, if you’re not arching your back during doggystyle till its about to break in half…you’re bad at sex#AskREL — AskREL (@AskREL) May 15, 2013
Guys, if your girl isn’t arching her back, help her out by pulling her hair#AskREL
— AskREL (@AskREL) May 15, 2013
If your lady won’t suck your balls, get a new lady
— AskREL (@AskREL) April 28, 2013
I call this my pussy magic juice. If youre not tailoring your diet to make sure you taste good you’re doing it wrong twitter.com/AskREL/status/…
— AskREL (@AskREL) April 26, 2013
So this Twitter was brought to my attention yesterday. Some chick Stoolie who just tweets dirty shit all day and wants to be a Sextologist, whatever the fuck that is. And naturally it’s hot and all that. But I have two big issues with this. One, if you’re gonna talk about fucking all day you need to reveal yourself. You need to put a face to the chick arching her back during doggy until it’s about to break while there’s a vibrator in her ass. That’s huge. Anyone can SAY hot things, but you need to BE hot for people to listen and care. I mean what if I got on Twitter and started saying “girls if your man won’t suck your clit get a new man”? People would, understandably, puke in their laps. So that’s 1, if you’re serious about this you gotta take off the mask.
And two: what the FUCK is magic pussy juice? It looks disgusting. No way that makes your business taste good. Also, why is it in a pitcher stolen from a bar and why does it need a cauldron sized spoon to stir it? I’m beyond intrigued by that thing. I googled magic pussy juice to see if it was a common recipe and naturally the results were just chicks squirting all over each other. Probably should have seen that one coming. So I’m gonna need @AskREL to unveil both those things before I take her seriously. And yes, what I’m saying is let’s have sex.
PS – Odds this is a dude? 1:1 sounds about right.