The Dozen: Trivia Tournament - Begins Tonight 7PM ETDon't Miss It

Avery Bradley Claiming He Lost 40 POUNDS This Offseason Is An Insult To Fatsos Everywhere

This was Avery Bradley last year as a member of the Memphis Grizzlies.

Memphis Grizzlies New Player - Portraits

This is what Avery Bradley looks like now as a member of the Los Angeles Lakers, “40 lbs.” less than what he weighed as a member of a Memphis Grizzlies.

2019-20 Los Angeles Lakers Media Day

Bull. Fucking. Shit. My man put on a yellow shirt and smiled, that’s not what losing weight means. You know what 6’1″, 181-pound Avery Bradley would actually look like if he lost FORTY POUNDS? This:

9A27F759-D17D-4EDE-98E9-05B782655DD5-21980-00000FD86AC881D2

And before you all turn into fucking weight loss specialists, I understand that muscle weighs more than fat. You’re not Neil deGrasse Tyson for knowing that. I get it. But I’m also someone who has *actually* lost at least 40 lbs three separate times over the last 12 years. You know what I look like when I lose 40 lbs? Someone who is still kinda fat, like if they hit the gym a little harder they’d be in decent shape. If Avery Bradley lost FORTY (40) POUNDS he’d drop dead. He certainly wouldn’t look EXACTLY THE SAME as he did when we last saw him.

Just one of the more outrageous lies I’ve ever read on Al Gore’s internet. I’m glad the world class athlete got into better shape in his mind this offseason. I almost sort of appreciate that he didn’t use the standard pro athlete lie of “Oh yeah I lost 25 lbs this offseason, best shape of my life.” That’s all well and good. But it’s an insult to us fats for this skinny sunovabitch to be out here bragging and boasting about losing an impossible amount of weight this summer.