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Can We Talk About What An Elite Week The US Patent and Trademark Office Has Been Having?

lebron-ohiost

That sound you just heard? That’s everybody rushing to claim the US Patent and Trademark Office off the waiver wires in the Fantasy Federal Government league. People want to stroke off Lamar Jackson and the Baltimore Ravens for their performance on Sunday but that was against the Miami Dolphins who I’m not even sure can be considered an actual football team at the moment. What the US Patent and Trademark Office just did is go out there and take down LeBron James and an Ohio State University.

Hey LeBron. You want to try to trademark a phrase that literally every single household in America has been using for at least the past 20 years? Fuck outta here, dickhead. The US Patent and Trademark Office isn’t going to fall for that shit.

Hey Ohio State. You jackasses really want to trademark the word “The”? One of the most commonly used words in the English language? Take a hike, bitches. Because the US Patent and Trademark Office runs this shit and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Truly one of the most impressive performances we’ve ever seen. I mean getting wins over LeBron and Ohio State would be a great year for any agency of the federal government. But the USPTO just racked up both of those wins within 24 hours of each other. I really don’t think people are comprehending how sick that is. It wasn’t like they were the Sunday night game and then had a short week with a Thursday night game coming up. It was like they were the Sunday night game and then ran it straight back with Monday Night Football. Elite elite elite.

@BarstoolJordie