NFL Power Rankings - Week 1: Tennessee Way Up And The Browns Way Down

It’s POWER RANKINGS time.

Week 1 (and Week 2, honestly) in the NFL is the worst time of the year to make snap judgments on teams. There are so many flukes, so many moments of teams figuring things out and so many teams boosted (or hurt) by the adrenaline rush of the opening weekends.

With that said, we still have a sworn duty (myself, Steve Cheah and Willie Colon of Barstool’s NFL podcast, Surf & Turf: click here to subscribe, new episodes on Thursday) to rank all 32 teams in the NFL.

But, with that said again, how about we see if there are any snap judgments we can make with each team. Let’s spice it up a bit…

REMINDER: Power Rankings aren’t a reflection of standings and, as always, try not to take anything too personally… we don’t hate your specific team, we just hate everyone’s teams…

SNAP JUDGMENT? Yes. The Dolphins are fucking terrible.

VOTING: Jeff (32), Willie (32), Cheah (32)

SNAP JUDGMENT? I can’t really make one here with the combination of two things: it was the head coaching debut for Vic Fangio and an emotional home opener for the Raiders. Don’t get me wrong, the Broncos looked bad, but the duo of the Antonio Brown saga and the final home opener in Oakland definitely juiced this game up a bit for the underdog Raiders.

VOTING: Jeff (31), Willie (28), Cheah (31)

SNAP JUDGMENT? The easiest judgment to make is that the Buccaneers have to be at their breaking point with Jameis, right? He was pretty brutal from start-to-finish despite a late 3rd quarter touchdown that kept Tampa in the game. We need Bucs Superfan and Scout Steve Cheah to make his official statement after next week’s game.

VOTING: Jeff (30), Willie (30), Cheah (29)

SNAP JUDGMENT? Yes… run Saquon Barkley more than five times in the first half. Don’t get me wrong, Barkley’s workload shouldn’t be “career-ending,” but for a rebuilding team with some holes, put the ball in the hands of your star! I’ll also state a judgment I’ve made for a long time now: Pat Shurmur, bad coach. He was brutal in Cleveland and if the Giants succeed with Daniel Jones and Saquon Barkley, in my opinion, it won’t be under Shurmur.

VOTING: Jeff (29), Willie (29), Cheah (30)

SNAP JUDGMENT? There isn’t much to pull from this game for me other than the fact the Redskins’ running back situation is pretty rough. Thirteen rushes for 28 yards is just not ideal and now Derrius Guice is hurt. With that said, they did play a pretty solid first half against the Super Bowl contending Eagles. This isn’t a great team, but I commend the road opening effort.

VOTING: Jeff (28), Willie (31), Cheah (28)

SNAP JUDGMENT? Here is an easy one to make: John Ross III is very good. The third year player’s statline is pretty wild looking…

One-third of his catches last year were for touchdowns and he has already almost eclipsed his total yardage for all of last season through just one week. The absence of A.J. Green helped his cause and Andy Dalton was pretty impressive in Seattle. I still don’t think the Bengals are all that good, call it AFC North bias, and expect them to fall back down after the initial weeks of the season.

VOTING: Jeff (27), Willie (26), Cheah (27)

SNAP JUDGMENT? This is a very tough one to make a judgment on because of the C.J. Mosley injury. Everything seemed to change, for the worse, with the Jets once he went down. All teams battle injuries, but with Mosley expected back next week, it’s hard to truly break down the Jets. The offense didn’t look great, but there’s no need to bury the Jets… yet.

VOTING: Jeff (23), Willie (27), Cheah (23)

SNAP JUDGMENT? Another team with a major injury, the Jaguars hung tough with Gardner Minshew after Nick Foles went down the IR-worthy injury. They dropped further than I thought they should, but, still, the Chiefs did wax them in the end.

VOTING: Jeff (22), Willie (25), Cheah (26)

SNAP JUDGMENT? This is an easy snap judgment: Kyler Murray is going to be good. He led the Cardinals on a huge comeback all while his own linemen were trying to tackle him…

He made some big throws in his debut despite playing behind a swiss cheese offensive line. The biggest concern for the Cardinals this season needs to be making sure he finishes the season healthy.

VOTING: Jeff (26), Willie (24), Cheah (22)

SNAP JUDGMENT? I still have no fucking clue how the Lions blew that game on Sunday. For as much as a tie felt like a win for the young Cardinals, the exact opposite has to be felt for the Lions. Everything fell apart for the Lions and the snap judgment I will make is that they can’t have games like that (this is an obvious take, I know) when they have to play in what appears to be a very strong division.

VOTING: Jeff (24), Willie (23), Cheah (21)

SNAP JUDGMENT? …

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VOTING: Jeff (21), Willie (22), Cheah (24)

SNAP JUDGMENT? Good for the Raiders. That’s my judgment, we should be happy for Oakland Raiders fans. Losing your team is garbage, so winning that first home game of the season before the Las Vegas move was great to see. I’m not totally sure how good they really are, and we will find out without all of the motivation attached, but I do like this Darren Waller fellow we got to know through Hard Knocks.

VOTING: Jeff (25), Willie (20), Cheah (18)

SNAP JUDGMENT? The Browns were the least, and worst, prepared team in the NFL last weekend. Almost 200 yards of penalties, an offensive gameplan that was a departure from what got Freddie Kitchens hired, the list goes on and on. Also, your starting tackle should probably avoid kicking people. I don’t think you can really judge the ability of this team yet, but if they continuously shoot themselves in the foot against the Jets and lose? The verdict may arrive much sooner on Cleveland than we thought. (Shout out to me not having them ranked the best out of the three voters)

VOTING: Jeff (20), Willie (18), Cheah (25)

SNAP JUDGMENT? My snap judgment is that Panthers fans are mad. We had a caller on Barstool Radio tear Cam Newton and Panthers to shreds on Monday, even though Carolina kept it close for much of the second half.

VOTING: Jeff (19), Willie (17), Cheah (19)

SNAP JUDGMENT? One note: Steve Cheah says the 49ers are not good. So, there you have it, a snap judgment.

VOTING: Jeff (16), Willie (19), Cheah (20)

SNAP JUDGMENT? This is the opposite end of the coin in terms of making Week 1 judgments. I’m not going to call the Bills good, but I do think we undervalued them, especially the defense. Credit to Josh Allen for salvaging a bad game and pulling out the victory, but the defense, including stud rookie Ed Oliver, kept the Bills in the game all afternoon.

VOTING: Jeff (18), Willie (21), Cheah (15)

SNAP JUDGMENT? I feel safe making a snap judgment here: the Colts are still a good team. With that offensive line, as evidenced by Marlon Mack’s league best Week 1 game on the ground, they should contend all season. A little better of a start in Carson, California and they might be 1-0 right now.

VOTING: Jeff (17), Willie (14), Cheah (17)

SNAP JUDGMENT? The Bears might be one of the Top 5 teams in terms of not making a snap judgment after Week 1. Offensively, they were a mess, but the defense is still clearly elite and I expect a big bounce back on Sunday.

VOTING: Jeff (13), Willie (16), Cheah (13)

SNAP JUDGMENT? Throw the Steelers in the mix with the Bears as well. Actually, the Steelers looked way fucking worse, but the point remains the same with them that judging off of that first game seems reckless. The Patriots were going to dismantle anyone they played after getting moved off of the Thursday Night opening slot. I expect Beck, Conner and JuJu to round back into form this weekend, but there are some Yinzers not very pleased with what they saw in Foxborough during Week 1…

VOTING: Jeff (14), Willie (11), Cheah (16)

SNAP JUDGMENT? I’ll make the snap judgment that Mike Vrabel is the most underrated coach in the NFL. His gameplan against the Browns was perfect. The Titans played into the emotion and energy of Cleveland, let them beat themselves (just watch this fist pump)…

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…and then, when it was the right time, they put the clamps on the Browns. The Titans are scrappy, but it brings Vrabel’s squad success and they got off to a hot start.

VOTING: Jeff (15), Willie (13), Cheah (12)

SNAP JUDGMENT? I think we blew this ranking. That’s my judgment. The Texans were a 58-yard field goal away from an incredible season-starting win over the Saints in New Orleans. There is one concern though, and that is the fact the Texans’ offensive line still looks terrible. Watson was sacked six times and they have to figure that out as soon as possible.

VOTING: Jeff (12), Willie (15), Cheah (8)

SNAP JUDGMENT? There isn’t anything declarative to pull from Seattle, which is the only 1-0 team to fall in our rankings by more than one spot. Part of the reason for the move is because of the fact they had to squeak one out against the Bengals and the other reason being that team that jumped them just had more impressive weeks. I’ll just assume they started slow, because I expect the Seahawks to be a Top 10 team this season.

VOTING: Jeff (11), Willie (12), Cheah (11)

SNAP JUDGMENT? Dalvin Cook is very good. He looked exactly like the running back the Vikings wanted to take a few years back in the draft. Not many teams ran a back more than 20 times in Week 1, but the Vikings did and it paid off with Cook. Could this be the recipe to success? Cousins wasn’t bad last year, he was, in fact, quite good for most of the season, but having the team’s offensive success land on Cook’s shoulders seems like it might be a good move.

VOTING: Jeff (10), Willie (9), Cheah (10)

SNAP JUDGMENT? The judgment I won’t make is saying the Chargers do not need Melvin Gordon after their Week 1 win. Austin Ekeler was pretty solid on the ground and really good in the passing game (his strong suit) but you can’t tell me the Chargers wouldn’t be better off with Gordon on the roster. Despite nearly blowing a 15-point lead, the Chargers hung on and look like the rock-solid team we expected to see.

VOTING: Jeff (7), Willie (8), Cheah (14)

SNAP JUDGMENT? I won’t make a call on Lamar Jackson yet, but I have always been a believer in the guy. It pains me as a Browns fan, but I do think he is going to be good. Don’t get me wrong, I expect him to have issues in the passing game at some point against teams not named the Miami Dolphins, but holy shit he was impressive in Week 1.

VOTING: Jeff (8), Willie (7), Cheah (9)

SNAP JUDGMENT? It was quite a boring game, but I think it is safe to say that the Green Bay defense had one of the best performances in the NFL last week. The NFC North is going to be brutal, but the Packers are in great shape once Aaron Rodgers gets going.

VOTING: Jeff (9), Willie (10), Cheah (3)

SNAP JUDGMENT? My snap judgment is that the Cowboys should probably pay Dak and get things out of the way now. One guy who is for sure going to get paid is Kellen Moore. I would be shocked if the 30-year-old offensive coordinator is not locked up as the head coach in waiting by Jerry Jones at the end of the season.

VOTING: Jeff (6), Willie (6), Cheah (4)

SNAP JUDGMENT? It’s less of a judgment and more of a fact, but the Saints six-year Week 1 losing streak is finally over. The Saints offense had some early hiccups but still looked elite in the process of their thrilling victory over Houston.

VOTING: Jeff (4), Willie (4), Cheah (5)

SNAP JUDGMENT? I will make a snap judgment and say the Eagles offense is going to be dynamic. They toyed around a bit early with a sloppy start at home, but once Wentz started to air it out, the Eagles looked like one of the best teams in the league. The Wentz and DeSean Jackson hook-up is going to be scary. The early slow start means nothing to me at all.

VOTING: Jeff (2), Willie (5), Cheah (6)

SNAP JUDGMENT? The easiest snap judgment is that it is clear the Rams are playing it safe with Todd Gurley. He looked great, but they have a bit of a hold on running him into the ground too early. It’s also worth noting on the side that the Rams have a really tough schedule this season. (Cheah apparently is a hater, because he is the reason they dropped in the rankings)

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VOTING: Jeff (3), Willie (3), Cheah (7)

SNAP JUDGMENT? This is not quite an easy snap judgment, but it looks like the Chiefs might be fine without Tyreek Hill? That seems crazy to say, but Mahomes and the offense didn’t miss a beat in the first game of the season. The defense did get chewed up a touch by rookie Gardner Minshew, but I doubt that matters much.

VOTING: Jeff (5), Willie (2), Cheah (2)

SNAP JUDGMENT? Here is the easiest, most obvious snap judgment to make from Week 1 of the NFL: the Patriots are the best team in football… by far.

VOTING: Jeff (1), Willie (1), Cheah (1)

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Thoughts? Comments? Concerns?

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Talk to you next week and make sure to listen and subscribe to Surf & Turf…