Get A Load Of This Bitch Claiming She's Single Because She's Too Witty & Clever

Daily Mail - A recent study found men simply can’t handle it if a woman outshines them
Kate believes this is why she’s still single
She’s a published author and can speak multiple languages
She’s ‘lost count’ of times she’s been rejected for being witty and clever

Three months ago I went to Italy with my then boyfriend, Philip. As we were checking into the hotel, I struck up a conversation with the receptionist in Italian (just one of the five languages I speak). But while I was enjoying myself, chatting away, it became clear that Philip most certainly was not.  He shuffled from foot to foot, muttered something under his breath and rolled his eyes like a stroppy teenager.  Then in the lift he turned on me. ‘I was wondering when you were going to let me join your conversation,’ he snapped. I tried to laugh it off but I knew this was the beginning of yet another argument. ‘You always have to be the star of the show,’ he continued in our bedroom, as he began to systematically work his way through the mini-bar. Apparently I was argumentative, a know-all and an intellectual snob. What had I done? It should be depressingly obvious. I had dared to dent his fragile male ego. By speaking in a language Philip didn’t know, I had managed to make him – a successful writer, ten years my senior – feel small. How selfish of me to embarrass him in public with my linguistic prowess!  Like so many of the men I’ve dated, it was clear he expected me to play second fiddle to him at all times. It wasn’t the first time we had rowed about such things. One night, we ended up arguing over a BBC4 documentary on the origins of jazz. When he became annoyed that his attempts to outsmart my knowledge on the subject failed, he started singing loudly, to drown me out altogether. But the pointless fight over the receptionist was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Needless to say, our year-long romance didn’t last long beyond the flight home…My bedside table has always buckled beneath the weight of substantial, intellectually challenging books. I devour cultural documentaries and love nothing more than taking another evening class (Spanish, the most recent; philosophy set to be the next). As far as I’m concerned, a dinner party isn’t complete without a bit of an intellectual tussle during dessert – whether it be on the finer points of Ed Miliband taking on the trade unions, or President Obama playing a high-stakes game with President Putin over Syria. But little did I know that by honing my neurons and showing my intellectual rigour, I was scuppering my chances of romantic success.

Hey nerd! Nobody likes you because you’re annoying. Guys, girls, whoever. I don’t care if you can speak 50 languages and you’ve got an IQ of a thousand. The problem is you’re a fucking know-it-all asshole. Guys like pretty chicks who act girly and wanna fuck them. You wanna talk about the origins of jazz and trade unions. Newsflash babycakes: You’re boring. “My bedside table has always buckled beneath the weight of substantial, intellectually challenging books.” Congratulations, Ron Burgundy. I bet you’re a real blast in the sack!

Good for you that you’re smart. The problem is that you’re a dickhead. You’re arrogant about your intelligence, you think you’re better than people, and nobody likes an arrogant bitch. Also, you’re ugly. And I’m gonna go ahead and assume that unless I can count to 10 in Greek like I’m fucking Indiana Jones, you’re probably never gonna put out. That right there is a shitstorm for dudes not liking you.

But enjoy those night classes and 30 or 40 thousand cats at home. I’m sure you’re real happy.