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I guaranteed a bet in front of Dave and Big Cat and shit just got real


What have I done?

An hour ago, my debut on Barstool’s College Football Show went live, and yes, everything went well. I’m charismatic, talented and I know college football, so I was a success on the show.

But I have one problem.

After our gambling locks of the week segment, I decided to get even more emphatic and discuss my pick even further, as I detailed exactly why I think Mississippi State -20.5 (now -18.5) was a stone cold lock. Mississippi State beat this same opponent 56-10 last season and will improve offensively this season, thus I think the number is insulting.

But I used a word that drew some sharp reactions. I stirred up unrest on the set when I said “I guarantee it.” I knew something was amiss as soon as I said the word, because Dave Portnoy’s eyebrows immediately arched and he looked incredibly offended, while Big Cat audibly gasped.

So here we are. My first college football show and I threw my nuts on the table. We won’t have to wait long to see what happens. Mississippi State plays Louisiana at noon ET today, and I’ll go live during the second half to update on what’s happening.

I ain’t scared. I’ll walk straight up to this guarantee and taunt that bitch. Let’s see what happens.

Also, Dave, on the off chance I lose, please remember I have four children who enjoy eating and I moved my family across the country for this.