To The Blogger Who Almost 'Outed' An NFL Veteran And Told Him "To Be More Careful Next Time"
Uh, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?? I hope you step on a million Legos & that, for unforeseen reasons, you need to make at least 5 trips to the DMV this year & those happen to be the 5 busiest days. You’re an absolute scumbag.
That’s probably not the main takeaway that NFL veteran Ryan Russell would want me to have, but it got me fired up nonetheless. And I’m guessing some background would help here…
It was from a section of Russell’s beautifully written piece for ESPN:
“After my first season, a well-known blogger messaged me. He had come across an Instagram story of a man I was dating that included a quick snippet of me in the background. Even though the man and I were never in a post together, the dates, times and similar locations were enough evidence for the blogger to deduce that we were an item. The blogger could have revealed I was in a gay relationship. My professional world and personal world were colliding with me caught in the cataclysm. I panicked, then wrote back, reminding him that there were implications about his actions he didn’t fully understand.
If the blogger outed me, I was sure that would kill my career, one that was supporting not just me, but my mother and grandfather. He’d eradicate a childhood dream that was the product of years of work and sacrifice.
After hearing me out, know what that blogger told me? That he would grant me this favor, but that I should be more careful.
Let that sink into your brain: Even though openly LGBTQ people are thriving in every area of public life — politics, entertainment, the top corporations in America — they are so invisible in pro sports that a gossip blogger is doing a favor for a bisexual football player by not disclosing that he happens to date men.”
(I feel a slight bit of relief knowing that the anonymous blogger couldn’t possibly have been from Barstool Sports, because let’s be honest, doing any sort of deep, investigative work just isn’t gonna happen here.)
And again, that was only a small excerpt from a much larger dialogue on a ‘coming out’ of sorts for Russell, who played for Purdue, the Cowboys, and the Buccaneers. Now, on the comeback from an injury, he’s looking to suit up for the NFL again, but this time he doesn’t want to feel like he’s got to hide any part of who he is…
Today, I have two goals: returning to the NFL, and living my life openly. I want to live my dream of playing the game I’ve worked my whole life to play, and being open about the person I’ve always been.
Those two objectives shouldn’t be in conflict. But judging from the fact that there isn’t a single openly LGBTQ player in the NFL, NBA, Major League Baseball or the NHL, brings me pause. I want to change that — for me, for other athletes who share these common goals, and for the generations of LGBTQ athletes who will come next.
Russell spoke about how in the year he’s spent recouping from injury, he realized that working so hard to hide his personal life was hindering him on the field. I say with certainty, there’s no way he’s the only athlete out there who’s gone through that turmoil and I can’t imagine the stress. Whether he’s got more seasons ahead of him in the NFL or not, I think it’s important that he’s speaking his truth. It really does matter and I have so much respect for him.
I feel as though this could be a step toward that future. For myself, I’m not looking to be a symbol or media star. I just want to play ball for a team that knows me off the field and values me on it. I want to encourage teammates to be the same people they have always been. I want us to remain as close as family. I want to be able to dedicate my life to football without feeling like I can’t dedicate my life to truth as well.
Whatever I was to you before this letter, I’m still that now. We just know each other a little better.
*For the record, the only thing I judge Russell for is having been a Cowboy.