Chicago Sun Times – The Chicago Teachers Union on Monday rejected a sweetened contract offer that would increase teacher salaries 16% over five years.

Though a deal before the first day of school next Tuesday seems unlikely, Lightfoot wants to avoid a teachers strike similar to the one in 2012 that marred former Mayor Rahm Emanuel’s tenure.

Lightfoot is set to hold a press conference later Monday morning to address her offer and the CTU’s demands.

CTU President Sharkey said some progress has been made at the bargaining table, though the two sides remain a “really, really, really long way away” from a deal.

I love the idea of Lori Lightfoot fist pumping her way off the election stage right into the most unconquerable position known to mankind. Being Mayor of this city absolutely fucking sucks don’t ever forget it. She’s fighting with police. She’s fighting with union leaders. She’s taking vacations and sipping mai thais then coming back to teachers going on strike and an education system fraught with negativity and corruption. Literally there isn’t one good thing to say about her job or responsibilities other than she gets an occasional free meal from some fine local establishments. That’s nice.

Other than that, just a total pile of shit.

While she’s been napping on Martha’s Vineyard or whatever the Teachers Union has been ferociously ripping apart some independent report that was supposed to take into consideration all the needs for union negotiations. Something like that:

Mayor Lori Lightfoot announced a $351 million contract offer based on the independent fact-finder’s report.

The fact-finder met with the city and teachers union last month to hear them make their cases for their proposals. The CTU, meanwhile, rejected the report, saying the findings ignored the vast majority of its demands.

What’s funny is Lori Lightfoot taking this job thinking you can use reason. Judgment. Logic.

I mean for fuckssake the CPS said 14%. The Union wanted 15%:

The fact-finder recommending a 16% raise over five years instead of CPS’ proposed 14% raise over that term. The teachers union had asked for a 15% raise over three years.

THE CITY CAME BACK AT 16%

Think about that argument for a second.

I’ve been in some ridiculous arguments before. Real blow outs I tell you. And to turn down more than you initially asked for is probably the stupidest negotiation tactic I’ve ever seen.

Actually I lied.

The stupidest negotiation tactic I’ve ever see in crowdfunding a trip to support a socialist government then coming back and turning down 16%

At the end of the day though the union negotiation renewal comes down to more details like What To Do With Health Insurance and putting counselors in the building and Librarians at every street corner or some shit.

Honestly it’s just a good reminder of how #blessed and #lucky all of us Catholic Leaguers (and Other private school kids) are to not have to endure the CPS. It’s a day the kids from Rita and Mt. Carmel and Brother Rice and Loyola and Fenwick and sure we can throw in the ESCC (*rolls eyes at Montini*) and whoever else wants to proud for a second that every single teacher at your high school goes by Coach, wears a polo and khakis with Nike’s 100/100 days while eating Bosco cheese sticks and making that one kid* run laps all the time. Sometimes I feel like we didn’t really learn anything other than how to be a normal contributing member to society. Like how to fold a table properly. How to drink before you’re 21. How to be on a team but never play a down. The list goes on and nothing there says “SCORED A 3 ON THE AP CHEMISTRY TEST”

Point is we’re lucky we didn’t have to deal with all this bullshit. Seems like an absolute fucking nightmare just trying to get your way in the CPS.

But the real nightmare?

Kids home during the fall months when they should be at school. Nothing kills the fall mood more when you’re a housewife or husband trying to relax and jerk off and your kids are running around fighting because the teachers union didn’t want too big of a salary increase. WOW that would suck.

*I was that one kid all 4 years btw