Dude Shoves An Eel Up His Ass And, Naturally, It Tries To Eat Through Him

(RocketNews) — Before continuing the story it should be noted that the swamp eel is able to breathe air and travel across short distance of dry land. In addition, they are able to avoid drought and provide self-defense by burrowing deep into the muddy soil. So, when placed in what a swamp eel would clearly consider a threatening situation it followed instinct and burrowed deep into something muddy. The adult eel — which measured 50cm (20?) and weighed about 600g (1.3 lbs) — proceeded into the man’s colon and punctured it, requiring the man to be rushed to hospital for emergency surgery. In a surgery that took all night to perform, the eel was successfully removed from the colon. According to the blog it was still breathing when it was extracted. The man is currently recovering in hospital. There is no word on the fate of the eel.

Another day, another dollar when it comes to sexual Asian freaks. They churn out “rogue eel up ass” stories like Pres churns out pizza reviews and neither of them can recognize that what they’re doing is very damaging to their healthy. But I’ve accepted the fact that Asians live their life in a constant state of supreme arousal. It’s obvious. Like you know when you’re jerking off and think “you know what? Fuck it, let’s make a production out of this” and you dive into some stuff that would make Joaquin Phoenix in 8MM blush? Or when you’re having good sex (admittedly very rare with me) and you can convince your girl to try something new? That’s how Asians are at all times. Always willing to push their limits. People love to make fun of them but you gotta kind of respect it. Belladonna looks at this eel and thinks Hahahahah oh no. I’m not putting that in my ass. Asian dude sees it and thinks Three Tsingtaos and I’ll give it a whirl.