If Your Favorite Player Growing Up Was Marty McSorley, Maybe You Shouldn't Be Playing Beer League Hockey Anymore

Uhhh hey, buds, good thing you have that swing down because it looks like you’ll be stuck playing beer league softball now after you catch a lifetime ban from that rink. I mean good god. I know that 9 in black threw the first little hack to the skates so it’s not like that rat is totally off the hook here. But to turn a little tap to the skates into a full blown homerun swing to the face? Yikes. Maybe you should have grown up idolizing a skill guy instead of watching Marty McSorley highlights before every game.


The thing that puzzles me, though, is that our guy over here is wearing #97. That’s a skill number. That makes me think that this dude goes out there thinking he’s Connor McDavid or something. From the looks of it, this can’t be any higher than a C League. So who knows. Maybe this guy is actually like the Connor McDavid of his local C League just because he’s the only guy who can make it all the way down the ice without falling. But to rock #97 and end up being a classic beer league goon looking to take out all the frustrations from his divorce on the ice? It brings great shame to that number.

P.S. – How about #9 just soaking that baseball hack to the face and barely even flinching? Probably would have been a different story if the stick didn’t break but still.