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The Yankees Amazing Injury News Today Almost Made Me Pass Out

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Today if you are a Yankees fan, you woke up to the best news humanly possible. Pretty much every big name, aside from Giancarlo (who cares at this point) had incredible injury updates as they try to get back to full health. Luke Voit, Severino, Dellin, Hicks, and CC. I legit might faint. Voit’s hernia has subsided enough that he’s running and will hit tomorrow. Severino threw his second bullpen and feels great. Dellin’s said his bullpen went better than he ever thought it would. Hicks’ pain in his elbow is gone and he’s hoping to be cleared to throw at some point today. CC is coming back for Cleveland this weekend. I mean holy shit let’s fucking go boys!

Don’t tempt with the idea of Severino and Dellin getting added to this bullpen, along with Montgomery who apparently looks unreal in his rehab. Don’t tempt with the idea of Luke Voit Sammy Sosa hopping all over the place in a few weeks.

All of this good news probably means something really bad is coming, that’s just how this season goes. Or maybe because we’ve gone through the worst, it’s time to actually get back to full strength. I have a full on erection right now.