Nothing Screams "Football Is Back" Quite Like A Bunch Of Eagles Fans Throwing Some Haymakers At The Stadium

Preseason is equally as important for the fans as it is for the team. While the offense and defense might be running through some plays and trying to figure out their personnel before the season gets going, the fans also need to figure out what they’ll be bringing to the table this season as well. You work through a few looks that you think will help in the actual season, and you also throw out some plays that just won’t work. So for these rascals out here at preseason game 1, they just needed to figure out precisely how big of shit bags they’re going to be this year. And from the looks of it, they’re looking to All-Pro level shit bags this year.

I mean I’ve been having a tough time trying to figure out exactly who is the worst in this clip. Is it the kid in the green Wentz jersey for jumping in and throwing shot after shot at the back of the other kid’s head? Is it the girl who most likely instigated this entire thing and then yelling out “I told you so” at the end? Was it the kid who was getting his ass beat for continuing to talk shit to that girl, and who I’m sure didn’t just get jumped out of nowhere here? Or was it this little bastard right here.

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Comes in once the brouhaha is already over, slaps the dude in the face and then steals his hat. That right there, ladies and gentlemen, is a Shit Bag Hall of Famer. And you know the worst part of all is that he’s going to tell the story like he was actual involved the whole time from now until the rest of his life. Talking about how “we kicked the shit out of this kid and then I stole his hat”, even though he just threw a bitch slap in there at the end when there was no actual danger. Yup. Definitely just made my mind up right now. Easily the biggest bastard of the whole bunch right there.

Anyway. Go Birds.