So My Dog Tried To Eat A Zebra Yesterday

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I’m going light on details here because it’s much better suited for Red Line Radio on Monday morning but for now I’d like to summarily say that my dog has an appetite for wild African game. It’s literally in his DNA as a Rhodesian Ridgeback / Boxer mix. Like his bread and butter is chasing down lions and shit. Seriously.

IMMUNE TO INSECT BITES he says.

Anyways.

My wife had a recent and forgettable birthday. She said she wanted to Do Something Simple like packing up the family for a 4 day trip to the middle of nowhere. Let’s Bring Scottie Somewhere Fun she says. My Friend Recommended This One Place…

Decision made. We’re in the car on our way to some protected habitat outside some national forest 6 hours from my front door. We’re out walking the dog off the leash for the first time in forever. We’re told there’s Some Deer and Some Goats and shit. Nothing we need to worry about because a few months a year, a bunch of people with guns and arrows show up and kill the wildlife. So the “offseason” – which is a fucked up thing to refer to the time you don’t kill all these animals – is when you come down here with the family and go hiking.

Again, great. Whatever.

They got a dish with direcTV and NBCsports Chicago and all that so I’m not crying like a pussy here guys I’m just keeping it real. Like it’s a pretty cool trip.

Just didn’t know there would be WILD FUCKING ZEBRA roaming the Kentucky border. Who knew.

Actually – one guy who works here.

I asked this morning Whats Up With The Zebra

ahhhhh shit. those are the ones we don’t kill round here. mostly just to give tourists a kick

not sure which one he meant