Jalen Ramsey's College Strategy Was To Look Up A Receiver's Instagram And Slide Into His Girlfriend's DMs

Lot of people think Jalen Ramsey is one of the best corners in the league – the highest ranked CB in the NFL Top 100 – because of pure athleticism and skill and instinct and raw talent.  Wrong.  It’s because he slides into the opposing receiver’s girlfriend’s DMs and probably fucks them at some point.  Before the game is even played you’ve already won.  Cuckboy can’t focus on his routes or blocking assignments because all he can think about was that look on his girl’s face when she opened her Gram and kind of turned her shoulder to hide her screen while grinning and biting her lower lip.

Ramsey is a character that’s for sure.  The fact that he has 21 blogs on Barstool Sports means he’s highly bloggable which means he’s highly entertaining.  Like driving a Brinks Truck to practice, starting fights with Brady and Gronk and Eli and Foles, playing lacrosse and hockey.  Oh and speaking of DMs, remember when he slid into a Jags’ fans’ messages then had to quickly abort when she asked him how his girlfriend and newborn baby were doing?  People don’t forget.

Oh and he’s ready to storm Area 51, obviously.

Very true statement.  He’s not just loud and flashy – he’s smart.