A Priest Is Begging Families To Please Stop Bringing Beer, Cigarettes, and Football Jerseys To Funerals

Fr Tomás Walsh who is the parish priest in Gurranabraher,

Independent - Irish News - A priest has urged families not to bring "appalling" items like cigarettes or beer up to the altar during funeral Masses.
Fr Tomás Walsh, of Gurranabraher parish on the northside of Cork, wrote in his weekly parish newsletter about what he considers to be unsuitable items being brought to the altar as offertory gifts. "Bringing things such as a can of beer, a packet of cigarettes, a remote control, a mobile phone or a football jersey does not tell us anything uplifting about the person who has died," he wrote.

I get where this guy is coming from, I really do. It's so annoying to try and put on a nice event, only to have assholes ruin it with their lack of professionalism. Trust me, I watched the Dunkin Awards.


But just because I see where this guy is coming from does NOT mean that I agree with him. In fact, I completely disagree with him. Although he may be running the funeral mass, it's still not HIS funeral. A priest during a funeral mass is like a referee -- you never notice a good one. This guy is trying to make it all about him. Hey buddy, if people are bringing beer, cigarettes, and football jerseys to someones funeral mass, that's because the deceased liked to party.

"A can of beer or a carton of cigarettes tells nothing beautiful about a person's life," he said.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, buddy. If they liked to smoke, give em some smokes. If they liked to drink, give em a drink. They're going to be 6 feet under for a pretty long time....I'm sure they could use a beer. Don't tell Father Walsh that though...

"Very often it might have been the drink or smokes that had killed the person in the first place. It's like saying 'Mary was a chain smoker so let's bring up a packet of cigarettes' or 'Jimmy was an alcoholic so let's offer up a can of beer'.

Dude, chill out. The guys already dead. No need to pile on to his grave. But I guess I can at least see what he's saying about beer and cigarettes, but what's wrong with offering up a jersey?

"I would have no problem if someone was heavily involved in their local GAA club and wanted to bring up their jersey, but very often these are Manchester United or Chelsea tops."

Whoa whoa whoa. This where he crosses the line. Just because you don't play for Manchester United or Chelsea does not mean that they cannot be an important -- if not the most important -- part of their life. No one is going to bring up my high school (varsity) basketball jersey to the altar, but they damn sure better bring up Braxton Miller's #5 Ohio State jersey. Live look into my future funeral: