Someone Apparently Kidnapped Mariano Rivera And Forced Him To Be In This Rap Music Video/Car Commercial

Hey Mo, blink twice if you’re in danger. Not to reiterate what my twitter caption says, but what in the world did I just watch? Did Mariano get kidnapped at some point in the last year and no one knew about it? That’s the only explanation for how that one minute rap video got made.

You can bet they didn’t tell him one single thing about what was going to happen in this video.
The moment the video begins Mo starts looking around, probably for his agent, wondering how in the fuck this is happening. For that whole minute he was scanning back his entire career and wondering how am I here right now?

Mariano Rivera is getting inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame today. He’s the best closer in the history of baseball. You could argue no player dominated their individual position more than Mo in any sport. And somehow we get this car dealership commercial in 2019 where he can’t move a muscle or speak. He was trapped for 60 seconds with nowhere to go while a wannabe Jay Z rapped in an auto-tune. It’s a Sunday and the combination of the sun and James Paxton has melted my brain to its very last cell. This video took that final one away. I’ve got nothing left.

I’m just so confused.