Andy Green Should Be Banned From Baseball For Life For His Managing Against The Cubs Today

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Okay so the Cubs just beat the Padres 6-5 blah blah blah whatever they.

We’ll first get the obvious out of the way: yes I’m petty.  Yes I’m jealous of the Cubs success.  Yes I am a loser and it’s embarrassing that I’m even writing this blog.

Now I can’t link the video for you because MLB sucks ass with social sharing and I’d get suspended and/or Barstool would get in trouble, so let me set the scene for you:

Top of the 9th.  6-5 Cubs up.  Kimbrell in, Myers, Tatis. Jr, Margot, Machado due up.  Myers leads off with a single (I think, he got on base, whatever).

This is the part where I immediately wanted to puke my guts out all over my entire apartment.  Runner on 1B, nobody out and Padres Manager Andy Green has Tatis Jr. SAC BUNT.

Needless to say, Tatis Jr. popped the bunt up to 3B because he probably has a brain and never thought he’d bunt again.  My head was about to explode just watching it.

It is without question the most egregious decision I’ve ever seen a manager consciously make multiple times in a row in my entire life watching this game.  I say that with ZERO embellishment.  I am fuming as my fat sausage link fingers hammer away at my keyboard.

Now if you’re a real novice baseball fan, this might seem like it isn’t that big of a deal.  Well, it is.  Fernando Tatis Jr. is one of the very best power hitters in baseball right now.  He hits leadoff, but imagine whatever team you root for bunting your cleanup hitter.  It’s mind numbingly dumb.

The kid is 8th in BASEBALL in OPS this year, 10th in slugging, yada yada yada.  The kid fucking mashes baseballs.  And Andy Green had him sac bunt in a 1 run game with no outs in the 9th.  It wouldn’t be *that* big of a deal if it were some slap hitter a la Jon Jay up to the plate but Tatis is not that.  He hit’s gaps and bleachers with regularity.


That, and he just hit a ball to the moon a few at bats earlier:

Also not only is it dumb that Green just had his best hitter bunt with no outs and a runner on 1st in a run one game, it’s also stupid as fuck to bunt in general.  Don’t believe me?  Ask science, bitch:


I get that bunting can be a feel thing.  An instinct thing.  A gut thing.  But that depends on who’s bunting.  If Fernando Tatis Jr. never bunts again it’ll be too soon.

Now AJ Preller has no choice but to fire him and Rob Manfred has no choice but to ban him for life.  Fuck you Andy!!!