Indians Fans: I Need You LOCKED IN These Next Two Weeks

Another day yesterday, another game closer the red hot Indians have come to the fraudulent Twins. Wasn’t it just 11.5 games like a week ago? Anyways, with the Twins getting swept by the almighty Mets this week and the Tribe rolling off 4 straight victories, my little act of calling this the greatest collapse in modern sport history has gone from schtick to 100% fact. I’m like Lavar Ball….

But here’s the problem: although there’s still two and a half months left in the season, I think these next two weeks are the most important for us. We need to make our move now. Look what we have coming up compared to what the Twins have.

Cleveland’s Upcoming Schedule: Detroit, Kansas City, Kansas City, Kansas City, Toronto, Toronto, Toronto, Kansas City, Kansas City, Kansas City, Kansas City

Fraudulent Minnesota’s Upcoming Schedule: Oakland, Oakland, Oakland, Oakland, Yankees, Yankees, Yankees

Hey Indians:

There is absolutely zero time for the Indians to take their foot off the gas. We need to make moves RIGHT NOW. We’ve won 4 in a row and we should legitimately win 10 of our next 11 easily. Meanwhile, the Twins are scratching and clawing to stay above water and will have their plates full with two very good teams coming up. I would seriously put it at a 75% chance that the Indians are in 1st place by August. And we NEED to be. Because look what comes after that…

In the words of the great Clay Davis:

That schedule is absolutely brutal. There’s no other way to put it. The Tribe need to make their push now, because it will be very, very difficult to make up any ground with that slate when it’s the Twins turn to play the Detroits and Kansas Citys of the world again. 1st place by August 1st. That’s the goal. It’s start tonight with the Tigers, lol. Easy win.