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Seagulls Are Fuckin' Assholes, Man

As humans, we’ve been feeling pretty good about ourselves for the past couple thousands of years. We’ve been running shit here on Earth. And while some nerds in lab coats may say that humans aren’t “technically” at the top of the food chain, we have built massive weapons which can wipe out literally everything and anything on Earth. Does a lion have a gun? Didn’t think so. They don’t even have thumbs to hold one. So technicalities aside, humans are at the top and we’ve been running shit for thousands of years. Out of all the living things in the world, we can kill the most of them.

Yet somehow, some way, seagulls still feel like they can fuck with us on a regular basis. The seagull to human relationship is an interesting one because I don’t think they’re afraid of us at all. They’ve learned that they can just take shit from us whenever they want and we’re really not going to do much about it. Like this seagull right here? The fact that these two dudes had their camera out to film the video here leads me to believe that this seagull was snatching food from people all afternoon. They were obviously prepared for this to happen because it probably happened 5 times earlier. Which means this seagull has just been posted up all day long waiting for a couple of dumbasses to come strolling along and deliver him some free food like a bunch of suckers.

It’s a great video, no doubt. But I think it’s about time that humans stick up for ourselves a little bit and remind seagulls where they belong. Because eventually some other animals are going to take notice as to what the seagulls are doing and they’re going to think it’s fair game too. We can’t be having that. It’s just a tough look.

@BarstoolJordie