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A Semi Truck Tipped Over In Kansas Leaving Pig Guts EVERYWHERE

I used to work in logistics as the most mildly above average freight broker in the freight broker capital of the world, Chicago IL.  I’d sit on the phone for hours with a bunch of asshole truck drivers that would inevitably fuck up my entire day.  Usually they’d have a “breakdown” en route to a pickup or delivery and I’d hear about it from like 4 different bosses and coworkers as if it were my fault.  Other times they’d just stop answering their goddamn cell phones.  Sometimes they’d have a family emergency.

That’s when I’d remind them that family emergencies literally do not exist.  Never ever has there been a family emergency in the history of the world.  I’d tell them to get their ass to their pickup otherwise I’d slash their rate in half.  It totally scared those assholes straight.

And while I’d be yelling at truck drivers for being complete and total morons, other people in the company would be making cold calls to anyone with product to ship under the sun.  So I’d like to give a quick shoutout to the broker that dipped his toes into the “pig guts carcasses” freight.  Not sure how you found a truck to haul it because most trucking companies are total pussies about “keeping their vans clean”, but I bet you got yourself a nice fat rip on it.  In the freight life we were ALL about those fatty rips.  We would rub it in our coworkers faces in between trips to the bathroom to abuse one hitters and various narcotics.

But here’s the problem: this truck tipped over and the pig gut freight was splattered all over the road.  So not only is the company not getting paid, neither are the sales reps.  If this truck driver is found belly down in a swamp somewhere, look no further than the brokers who booked that load of pig guts.  It was him.  It was 100% him.

I’m getting the scaries just thinking about it.