(NEWSER) – The Washington Post has spotted an almost too-hard-to-believe nugget from an international report on corruption: A hospital in Zimbabwe charges women $5 for every time they scream during labor. In theory, it’s to curb “false alarms,” but it’s really about “separating mothers from their money,” writes Max Fisher. Zimbabwean hospitals also typically charge a $50 delivery fee, which may not sound like much until you realize it amounts to a third of an average citizen’s yearly income, says Transparency International. That helps explain why so many women opt to give birth at home, and why the UN estimates that eight Zimbabwean women die each day in childbirth.
Honestly is there anything more dramatic than broads and the whole “giving birth” shtick? We get it. It hurts a lot. Now fucking pipe down. When guys get shampoo stuck in their dickhole are they fucking screaming and grunting? Do they need someone there to help them breath and hold their hand? No. We just sit there in agony for a little while quietly. Meanwhile broads in labor are just crying and screaming and breathing all “HOO-HOO HE! HOO-HOO HE!” Drama queens. Same goes for chicks playing tennis. Do you really need to shriek like an asshole? Hootin and hollerin all over the place? Shut your mouth before someone puts a dick in there.
Or you owe the hospital 5 dollars. What a power move by Zimbabwe hospitals. Charge a 50 dollar cover and then 5 bucks per scream. Imagine handing over like a 400 dollar bill to a poor African woman? “Congrats its a baby girl unfortunately you were giving birth too loudly so now you owe us literally a lifetime’s worth of money for an average African person.” Cold blooded.
PS – I love the main reason is to dissuade “false alarms.” We’ve got enough AIDS patients and people dying of malaria in here, don’t need any pregnant bitches crying wolf.