New App Allows You To Snitch On People Parking Illegally And Take A Cut Of The Fine

WINNIPEG – Some entrepreneurial Winnipeggers are set to unleash an army of bounty hunters keen on nabbing people who park in disabled parking spots without a permit or in front of a fire hydrant. All that would be needed is a smartphone and the “spotsquad” app. Co-founder Chris Johnson says he and his partners haven’t yet signed any agreements to give informants a percentage of any ticket fines, but he adds that some private parking lot operators are interested. He says while many people say they would never snitch on a fellow driver, he expects they would privately jump at the chance to make a couple of bucks while cracking down on inconsiderate parkers. The app would allow people to snap a picture of a parking violation and send the photo to police, private parking operators or city wardens. A parking warden could then be dispatched to issue a ticket. If a ticket resulted in a fine, under the plan, informants would get a cut deposited into their bank accounts or could direct the cash to their favourite charities. “If you can snap a picture and make $8, who’s not going to do that?” Johnson said Tuesday. “Especially when you already wish that guy wasn’t getting away with (breaking) the law when you’re staying within the lines.”

I know I say this kinda shit a lot. Over exaggerate quite often. And I really hate all sorts of people out there.

But when I say that these fucking Canadian Ticket Snitches are the worst people on earth next to terrorists and rapists, I really mean it. There’s just no other way to put it. Getting a parking ticket from some cocksucker meter maid is one of the worst feelings in the whole world. That moment you see that shit under your wipers theres a split second where you really wanna jump in traffic. I wouldn’t wish that second of despair on my worst enemy. And these motherfuckers are out there proactively dropping dimes on their neighbors. Like some sort of volunteer, vigilante meter maids snapping pictures and texting police. Fuck them.

I’m gonna create my own crew of bounty hunters that track down these parking meter bounty hunters and I’m going to pay them $9 a pop for every one they punch right in the fucking face.

PS – “If you can snap a picture and make $8, who’s not going to do that?” Johnson said Tuesday.” People with a goddam soul, thats who.