Scientist Says Soon We'll Be Making Our Babies With Celebrity DNA

SourceFuturologist Dr Ian Pearson believes parents will one day be able to choose from a “massive library of potential offspring”.

The ex-cybernetics engineer contends we will be able to insert chosen DNA into an egg to modify attributes including athleticism and good looks.

But astonishingly, he theorises that celebrity DNA may be bought for parents to tailor the looks of their own offspring.

This would mean parents could attempt to give their son the hunky facial features of actor Ryan Gosling, or the spellbinding beauty of pop singer Beyonce. …

“Even today, couples can store eggs and sperm for later use, but with this future genetic assembly, it will become feasible to create offspring from nothing more than a DNA listing.

“DNA from both members of a couple, of any sex, could get a record of their DNA, randomise combinations with their partner’s DNA and thus get a massive library of potential offspring.”

Here’s the part where we’re all supposed to fear this idea. Where we automatically assume it’s going to end horribly, based on a million stories where scientists play god, go against the laws of nature, create an abomination that gives them their comeuppance by destroying all they hold dear. From Mary Shelley’s “Frankenstein” to “Planet of the Apes” to every SyFy original movie from “Sharktopus” to “Dinocroc vs. Supergator.”

And usually I’m that guy. But not this time. Crossbreed genetically incompatible species and I’ll be the first to call you out. Experiment to try and make apes smarter and I’ll tell you your meddling with nature is dooming us all. But tell me I could have children with Ryan Gosling’s DNA instead of my own, and I’ll ask you where I go to sign up.

Not that I’m limiting myself to Ryan Gosling, but he’s not a bad start. He was great in “La La Land” and “First Man” and the criminally underappreciated “The Nice Guys.” Believe me, if I could take credit for the offspring of Bosley from “Remember the Titans” and my own genetically perfect Irish Rose instead of kids that are half me, believe me, I’m all in.

That’s not a knock on my sons, who are just fine. But if the human race is going to evolve as a species, we need more genetic material coming from super attractive, physically fit, wildly talented actors and musicians. And less from unambitious, B- minus Weymouth Public School students of below average looks and no discernible physical gifts to speak of. It’s be good for the kids. It’d be good for their mom. It’d be good for the human race.

If I had my pick of any Hollywood celebrity, I think I’d go with any given Chris from the superhero genre. Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth, Chris Pratt or Chris Pine. Put their DNA in a drum, spin it, pick any one at random and I know I’m ending up with kids with a dad who’s crazy handsome, smart, likeable, capable of drama or comedy, and who can save the world from fictional destruction and make you believe it. In other words, a significant upgrade from what my actual kids actually got.

So get on this, science. The fate of our species depends on it.