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72 Years Old is The New 30

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CNBC - Human longevity has improved so rapidly over the past century that 72 is the new 30, scientists say. Researchers at the Max Planck Institute for Demographic Research in Rostock, Germany, said progress in lowering the odds of death at all ages has been so rapid since 1900 that life expectancy has risen faster than it did in the previous 200 millennia since modern man began to evolve from hominid species.

Hey everybody who says I’m old as fuck and it’s creepy to hit on college girls and shit because I’m old and married? Boom roasted. It turns out I’m actually 18. Panama City Spring Break here I come! Viva.