Chicago Cop Fired For Trying To Bang A Teenager On The Job Even Though He Said It Was Part Of An Investigation
CHICAGO — A Chicago police officer who allegedly asked a 17-year-old girl for sex in return for getting her mother’s impounded car released by the city has been fired.
In the firing, the board criticized the police department for taking more than six years to bring disciplinary charges.
Officer Darius Alexander pulled over a car, containing the teen girl and three others, in May 2012. Two males inside the car were charged with drug offenses, which were later dismissed. The car was impounded and the girl and 18-year-old female were taken to the police station.
The teen says Alexander approached her at the station and offered to help get the car released from the pound. He then allegedly put his phone number in her cellphone. The two exchanged 47 texts as well as phone calls that night and Alexander “came on to Ms. Doe in a sexual fashion.”
Alexander claimed he met with the teen the next day, his day off, in a bid to learn the identity of the dealers who had sold the drugs to the two males. He alleged he had “played” the teen by falsely promising to help get the car out of the pound.
Alexander’s partner cast doubt on his claim, testifying he had never pursued a police matter on his day off and would not undertake his own investigation without first notifying his sergeant.
10 years ago I’d make some wisecrack about whether or not that’s a fair trade. I’d debate the pros and cons of sleeping with a middle aged man against my will to get my car back from the city. It would be extremely graphic and equally insensitive. Towards the end I would include a hand-drawn graph depicting the trade off between the quality sex I’d need to have and my desperation to get my car back. I’d use the graph to highlight my breaking point, and then I’d ask you – The Reader – to make a decision for yourself after asking the same question while posing different scenarios for your own scatterplot.
+ 22 year old rookie with the gender and body type of your choosing in need of a handcuff demonstration
+ 37 years old and also the gender of your choosing with some mileage around the waist and an “open mind” (read: ass play)
+ 44 and not attractive at all but you like a uniform and had some tequila in the afternoon
+ 50. Thicc. About as big as you’d go and very smelly. Gender of your choosing if that still makes a difference because like I said, very Thicc.
+ Officer Darius Alexander impounding your mom’s car
10 years ago I’d ask you to plot those out. I’d say scale of 1-10 how would you rate the quality of that sexual partner (specific to you, obviously) and then scale of $0-whatever how much money for that sex. 10 years ago I’d ask you to make some really hard choices about some very unsettling things. Then we’d walk through my methodology for judging the quality of sex step-by-step for each hypothetical partner with each description progressively more vivid than the last. By the time I got to Officer Darius Alexander Impounding Your Mom’s Car, you’d be begging for mercy from how life-like I could make that sex seem. Please stop Carl you are absolutely disgusting and disturbed.
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So instead I’ll just fast forward to present day and remind you that you’re only reading a blog. You’re not the 17 year old girl who was actually forced to consider this ridiculous fucking proposition in real life.
Fuck that guy. Coward.