"I'll Be Back" - The Terminator" - Joel Embiid To Aubrey Drake Graham
It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad game for the Philadelphia 76ers last night. You know that, I know that, the whole world knows that. The Sixers were just flat out garbage in Toronto last night. That’s the bad news. The good news, however, is that it was still only game 5. And even though the Raptors have a 3-2 lead in the series, the Sixers have already won 2 games in a row before in this series. They still have the ability to win tomorrow night back home and take the series to game 7. Which is exactly what Joel Embiid said to that bitch ass actor from Degrassi as he was leaving the floor last night.
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Now as you may recall, Drake and the rest of the fans in Toronto were mocking Joel Embiid as he was exiting the game in the 4th quarter last night. Kind of messed up to make fun of a guy who is practically dying on the court with how sick he was, but I guess that’s just who Canadians truly are inside. They like to act like they’re these sweet, polite folk who apologize for everything. But deep down inside, they are vicious animals. Embiid, being the bigger man in this situation, didn’t take the mockery too personally because he knows that this is just a game and that it’s all about having fun. But going full blown Terminator on Drake’s ass at the end of the night and telling him, “I’ll be back”? Well now Drake just woke up the lion. That right there is a guaranteed game 7. No matter what, this series is ending in Toronto. Embiid is about to load up on all the Emergen-C he can get his hands on and we’ll have an international war here on our hands for these final 2 games. Believe that.
And while we’re on the subject of assholes, I’m going to start keeping a list of all the people out there who can eat a bag of dicks.
Drake? Eat a bag of dicks.
Shaq and Chuck? Eat a bag of dicks.
Jalen Rose? Eat a bag of dicks.
If anybody else wants a bag of dicks, just let me know and I’ll add you to the list on sight.