Wake Up With Your 1st Place Chicago Cubs

I’ll be back later today with some heavy hitting analysis. For now, I want you to soaking in the glory that comes with 1st place in early May.

I know a few weeks ago we were saying that it’s a long season and nothing matters yet and blah blah blah – let’s be honest that was loser talk.

Fuck that.

I want Hell’s Bells playing every time one of these guys gets up to take a piss. I want one of those flamethrower machines from the Chicago Wolves games for player intros. T-shirt cannons launching sixers of Old Style into the 500 level.

It’s time to take it up a notch. First place isn’t for pussies.