Does This Look Like A Face Of A Broad Who Slapped A Cop So She Could Quit Smoking?
Sac Bee – A woman allegedly slapped a deputy to kick her cigarette habit this week in Sacramento. Etta Mae Lopez, 31, wanting to trash the ash and knowing that health is wealth, gave Sacramento Sheriff’s Deputy Matt Campoy a slap across his face in order to get herself booked into the Sacramento County Jail. Campoy was able to accommodate her unorthodox method for smoking cessation, booking her into the smoke-free county jail on suspicion of battery on a peace officer. The uniformed deputy didn’t think much of it when a woman approached into his path from his right side. “I stepped the left, she stepped to my left,” remembered Campoy. “I stepped to the right, she stepped to my right. I stepped to the left again and she suddenly stepped into me and slapped my face.” He grabbed Lopez’ hands and put her into a control hold before guiding her into the jail lobby. When he released the control hold to have her sit on a bench, she slapped his arm. “She knew that the only way to quit smoking was to go to jail because they don’t allow tobacco in the jail,” said Campoy. “She waited all day for a deputy to come out because she knew if she assaulted a deputy she would go to jail and be inside long enough to quit her smoking habit.”
Well don’t blame Etta Mae. Kicking the habit is essentially the same as avoiding a walker in The Walking Dead, according to the CDC’s ad campaign. It’s life or death. You’ve seen the monsters that are making us puke in our living rooms. One minute, you’re watching the game. Next minute, this dude’s hacking up a lung in your face:
Or maybe it’s Terri growling her “tip of the day”:
And that version of Terri is actually a step up from the OG Terri:
So congratulations, CDC. You’re making an impact & terrifying smokers like Etta Mae, who are in turn making an impact across cops’ faces to get locked up & quit Virginia Slims. I just hope police officers across the country keep their guard up now that it’s public knowledge attacking them is the key to health.